Samantha
I heard the front door open before Charlie turned on the light, finding me shrunken on the couch.
"Sam, you're still awake! " she exclaimed with concern.
I took my phone, noting it was after 2:00 in the morning. I lay here waiting for Theon to return the call and I didn't even notice the passage of time.
"I think I got some sleep," I sat down.
"What happened? Why are you here?”
"I called him ," I explained, feeling my face warm.
" Oh, I understand," she sat next to me.
I've been running away from that connection ever since I found out about the pregnancy. The girls were trying to convince me to call Theon since my appointment last week, but I always lost my nerve at the last moment, and today, reviewing the ultrasound photos, I decided to try.
“How did he react? " she held my hand.
"The way you expected, I think," I shrugged, looked away," first he thought I was joking, then he said he needed some time, and he'd call me later, and he didn't call me anymore.
"Do you think that's a bad sign? " she observed me.
"I don't know," I admitted, "I found out a fortnight ago, and I'm still freaking out a little bit, I wouldn't judge him for dancing naked in the snow or anything.
Charlie laughed beside me, and I couldn't help but join her.
"From what you've told him, it would be a good sight," Charlie teased me.
"No, it would be an incredible sight," I laughed, feeling a little better.
It wasn't so bad, your reaction was better than I expected. Maybe he'll call me tomorrow. Or later.
"Well, it can't be easy to get this news over the phone," Charlie indicated that I'd lie on his legs.
"No, you mustn't," I sighed.
She started messing with my hair, offering me a little comfort.
"He said it won't go away," I commented staring into the void.
"That's good, at least it's responsible.
"He's older, I think that influences," I explained.
"It's going to be all right, Sam," she declared, "you'll take care of it. I know you will.
"I hope you're right. I just remember the sound of the baby's heart and the fact that there's someone who depends on me now —I turned my face to face it—I don't know him and I can't say I feel all maternal right now, but I want him to be okay.
Charlie gently pushed me so I could get up.
"And he'll be fine, especially after his mother's a little sleep," she instructed me, "Come on Samantha, it's late. He's not going to call today.
I accepted your suggestion, going to the room deciding to rest. I woke up almost at lunchtime the next day, feeling like my stomach was being corroded by acid. I needed to eat something urgent.
I went to the kitchen after brushing my teeth, where Charlie was preparing our breakfast, had some eggs and strips of Bacon scattered all over the countertop.
"Are you feeling better? " my friend smiled as she watched me approach.
"I'll feel better as soon as I eat something—I sighed, watching everything that was scattered there.
I loved all those things, I always did. But today I couldn't even look at Bacon.
"Do you want something else? — she asked worried ly as I felt my stomach turn.
"I don't know, maybe fried chicken? "I scoffed at watching my friend keep the bacon when the intercom rang—Are you expecting someone?
"No," she walked to the device while I picked up a cookie in a jar on the counter - Who is it?
" Uh... Theon. Is Samantha there? — the voice went off the other side causing me to choke on the cookie.
"What's he doing here? "I whispered to Charlie that he would cast a confused look at me.
"I don't know! Should I let you in? — she whispered back.
"I'm not dressed! "I returned, pointing to the old, long regatta that I wore as pajamas.
"What do I say then?
"Excuse me, miss," an unknown voice has softened, "if you keep pushing the button we hear everything. Samantha, I'm sure my cousin has seen you... There...
"Samantha, can we talk? "Theon asked for a little panting".
"She'll come down," Charlie decided in my place.
I ran into the room, trying to get ready as quickly as possible, while Theon was waiting for me at the entrance. Did he really travel so many miles to talk to me?
I put on black knit pants and a moose blouse, fastened my hair in a ponytail and rushed out, wearing a sneaker on the way. It didn't take me long to get to the concierge, where Theon and another boy were waiting for me.
"Hi," I changed my gaze between the two, a little out of place.
I didn't know how to act near him, and he seemed to be suffering from the same evil, as he watched me with both hands in his pocket. We didn't even look like the same people from weeks ago, who couldn't keep their hands off each other whenever they were in the same environment.
His look lingered a little on my face before coming down and settling on my belly. It was your friend who prevented the situation from getting even more uncomfortable.
"Hi Samantha, I'm Gregor Evangelous, Theon's cousin. It's a pleasure to meet you—He reached out, squeezing mine with kindness.
"It's a pleasure, you're the one who got married? " I smiled politely.
"Exactly, and as the child was conceived because of me, if it is a boy, it must be called Gregor—He blinked, causing my face to warm.
"Gregor I call you when i'm done, you can crawl into any casino you find until then— Theon muttered, seeming annoyed by his cousin's prank.
"And so he kicks me out. It's been a pleasure, Samantha. Congratulations on the baby — He waved before walking away.
I sighed, looking around without knowing how to act.
"Do you know any restaurant nearby? "He questioned, breaking the silence.
"Yes, there's one on the next block.
We walked side by side without saying anything. I was thinking about how I could start that conversation, but I had no idea what to say. As soon as we arrived, we settled into a table, choosing what to order on the menu and taking advantage of that moment to gather all the courage needed for what would come next.
"Have you decided what you're going to order? "A young waiter broke the awkward silence that settled between the two of us.
" Samantha?
"I don't know," I suspected alternating my gaze between salmon and a steak with vegetables, "I don't know what I want.
"Nothing caught your eye? - he frowned.
"In fact, I'm in doubt between the salmon and the steak," I explained, feeling my face blush.
Since when have I lost the ability to choose between two simple dishes!?
"We want a salmon and two steaks," he decided, delivering the menu to the waiter-- and two orange juices to drink?
"It may be," I babbled confusedly.
He thinks I'm going to eat all this?
The waiter walked away, leaving us there alone.
" Theon, I'm not going to eat two plates!
"You don't have to eat them both now. What you don't eat, we ask you to pack for the trip—he shrugged—I don't want you to feel like anything later.
"I don't know if that's how it works," I rolled my eyes, containing a little smile.
I felt good about that slightest gesture of care. Elle and Charlie had been trying to take care of me for the last few days, but it was different when this care came from my son's father.
"Don't worry, every restaurant packs for the trip," he said with a smile.
"I'm talking about the question of will," I gave back, "I was just in doubt about the two of you, I don't need to eat both.
"I'd rather not risk it," he blinked, stealing my breath, reminding me of exactly what brought us to this situation!
Silence once again reined between the two of us after that. It was obvious that we would have to talk at some point, but we didn't know how to start.
I took my hand up to my belly, stroking her. My abdomen, previously defined, was already acquiring another form, showing that there was someone living there. Charlie assured me that it hadn't changed much, but I could see the difference.
"I thought you'd call me," I started.
"I'm sorry, I thought it would be best to have this conversation in person," he scratched his throat-- how are you?
"I am fine," I answered timidly, "and you, how are you digesting all this?
"Samantha, I'm going to be honest with you...
"You're freaking out, aren't you? "I looked away.
"It's not easy, children weren't in my plans for years to come," he sighed.
"I don't even know if children were in my plans," I admitted, "but now...
"Now we have to deal with it," he took a deep breath- "How do you want to do it, Samantha?
How? — I pised stunned by the direct question.
Of course we needed to discuss it, but did we need to approach it in such a direct way?
Luckily, the waiter approached the table with our requests, giving me an over-the-top moment to think about what to answer.
"All right, Theon— I suspected when I noticed the boy's dull look — as I told you, we can do the DNA test, I've done the DNA test, and we can do it even before the baby is born, but I'd rather wait, if you don't mind.
"We can wait, we will do as soon as he is born," he agreed before amending, not that I don't trust you, but...
"We don't know each other," I looked away, picking up the cutlery in an attempt to distract me.
"I didn't mean to offend," he tried to fix it.
"All right, I understand," I assured without staring at him, feeling a knot form in my throat.
Not now, Samantha!
"Samantha, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend, really—he hurried to see me blink to ward off the tears that threatened to flow in my eyes.
"It didn't offend," I denied trying to cut a piece of steak," I'm sorry, it's the hormones, I'm fine.
"Are you sure? "he asked worriedly, handing me a paper napkin—I know it's hard, but we need to talk about it.
"I'm fine, really—I was able to control myself—I was just terrified the last few days and now that you're here.
"You should have called me sooner," he reached my hand over the table, "I'm sorry you went through this alone." If I can do anything to make you feel better.
"Maybe you can wake me up and tell me it was all a dream? "I forced one smile, receiving another in return.
"It would be good," he laughed, "Why don't we eat and talk about it later?"
"Thank you," I sighed relieved before focusing on feeding the little being who wasn't happy inside me at all.
We both ate in silence for a few minutes, and little by little I became better. He was there with me after all. That's a good sign, right? I'm not alone.
"I got the pictures you sent yesterday, are you already doing prenatal care? " Theon broke his silence after a few minutes, watching me with fun as I alternated between fish and meat.
"Yes, I started last week, Elle got an emergency appointment with her doctor—I forced myself to swallow what was in my mouth.
"And how was everything? — he seemed interested.
"I'm nine weeks now, she gave me some vitamins and I did other tests. It's okay, it's okay.
"And when are you born? " he asked.
"In early March," I recounted, siluting the glass of juice, the same month as my birthday.
"Really? Do you have your birthday in March? " he smiled.
That question affected me, I don't know anything about the man I'm going to have a child with!
"God, we know nothing about each other," I moaned disgusted.
Theon seemed bland with that comment.
"I don't think so," he agreed, when is his birthday, Sam?
"Twenty-five March," I suspected, "and yours?
" December 3rd.
Once again that silence has once again dominated us. We focused on our food, but my mind was spinning, thinking about what I had got myself into getting pregnant with that man.
"Good... And you're getting to work? — he questioned in an attempt to bring up a new subject.
"I've been discharged last week," I admitted, "the doctor didn't think it would be a good idea to continue with my routine."
"Couldn't they put you in another role? — he asked surprised.
"Well, they hire me to dance, if I can't do that... -- I shrugged -- and they'd soon dump me anyway. Soon I won't be attractive enough anymore.
"Don't be silly," he let go of, "You're very beautiful, nothing's going to change that."
I felt my face warm in front of that compliment. It wasn't the first time he told me I was pretty, and I heard it many times during our brief romance. But it was the first time I didn't feel that way.
"Do you want dessert? — he asked when he saw that I had finished eating.
"No, thank you," I denied.
Theon signaled the waiter to close the bill and pack the rest of my dishes to go, insisting on paying. Soon we were walking under the hot snowy sun, my mind still focused on the praise of before. I had felt my mood improve a lot with it and thought of some way to reciprocate.
"We can talk about the pension— He commented attracting my attention as we walk back to the apartment — I'd like to be more present than that, but Colorado is a little far from Las Vegas.
I understand that. But I won't be here that long. I don't think it's the right place to raise a child.
I explained something I've been planning for some time. I hadn't yet decided where I would go, but I had some savings and could ask my parents for help, although I still didn't feel at all comfortable telling them about the baby.
"Where are you going to move to? — that seems to have caught the boy's attention.
"I don't know yet," I admitted, "I'm researching some options." Maybe Florida or Alabama.
I was hoping I could avoid returning to Texas.
He thought for a few moments before he started speaking again, seeming afraid.
"What if you moved to Aspen?
" Aspen?
"In Colorado, it's the city I live in," he explained as I understood what he was proposing-- I could help you settle into the city, you wouldn't have to be a solo mother, I could participate in everything and be a father present.
Your suggestion made sense. Besides, we could try to get to know each other better. If I'm going to get involved with someone, let it be the guy I made a son with, right?
Well, it can be. I have some savings, I can rent a place and get a job.
I stroked once again the belly, thinking about everything I would have to do.
"That's great," He smiled for a second, but then the smile died.
"What's going on?" - I questioned suspiciously.
Did he think better and regret the proposal?
"There's something I need to tell you," he scratched his throat.
"You can talk—we were only a few meters from home, so slow down a little bit, trying to prolong that moment a little longer.
"I have a girlfriend in Aspen" He let go at once.
I pisqued stunned, feeling the world turn around me. Did he just say he has a girlfriend in his town? I can't believe it, he...
He made me the other one!
"Samantha, are you okay? — he came towards me, seeming worried.
"Did you say girlfriend? "I took a step away from him" -- You didn't tell me anything about a girlfriend when we first met!
"She did not yet exist," he hastened to explain, "I began the relationship after my cousin's marriage.
"I think I need to sit down," I admitted, as the Nevada heat began to sink.
Theon passed his arm by my waist, leading me to a bench that stood in the shade of a tree.
"My blood pressure drops sometimes," I explained, "I'll soon feel better. The doctor says it's normal.
"I'm sorry for all this situation," he continued with his arm around my waist
"And what does your girlfriend think about all this? — I asked the most important question.
I don't want to get involved in anything so complicated.
"She doesn't know yet," he sighed, "I intend to tell her soon.
"And you think it's a good idea for me to go to your town? I don't want to be in the middle of anything—I looked down.
I really don't want to get in the way of his life, it's not like we're forced to be a couple just because we're going to have a kid. We are adults, we are able to make this work wisely and without any romantic involvement.
" I'm sure she'll understand, besides, I really want to participate, Sam. I don't just want to contribute financially and be absent in this child's life—he let go in a supplication- I want to follow every detail.
I couldn't help but smile when I heard that. It would be great for Theon to think that way, because I don't think I can raise a child on my own. My hand touched my belly again, every moment that passed I felt more comfortable with that new situation. I could handle that.
"Samantha, I...
"What's going on?" — I raised my gaze to face him.
"This may be a little strange, but can I? — he cast a significant look at my belly.
It took me a few seconds to figure out what he wanted, I wasn't used to people asking permission to touch my belly.
" Ahh yes, of course," I took my hand off giving him free access.
Theon got on the bench before he took his hand up to my belly. He seemed afraid to touch me, as if it might hurt me in some way, but when his hand reached its goal, he seemed to relax a little.
"You can't feel it yet, but he moves a lot," I smile, his heart is also very strong.
"I wish I had seen it," he remarked with a small smile on his face.
I'm sorry, i'm sorry. But I can let you know about the next one if you want.
"I would love to," he smiled openly, causing me to hold my breath.
I hope the baby has the beauty of the father, because I knew how to choose. Not that I was looking for a father for my baby, or even a baby.
"So what do you tell me. Will you move to Aspen? — he questioned anxiously.
"I don't know, I... I think I need to think about it-- I've pondered.
That was an important decision, I couldn't make it so from one time to another, although that seemed the best solution.
"Sure, you might think," he discouraged a little bit- it's a big change and I don't want to put pressure on you. I'd just like to be around and follow everything.
"I know, and it would really be great that you were," I said, "I want you to participate, Theon." I don't want to deal with this alone, but...
"But?
" Theon, your situation. I don't know how she's going to get that news.
"Samantha, I know it's a complicated situation," he held my hand-- But Harper is an amazing woman, she'll understand that situation, and I'm sure you'll get along.
"What if it doesn't? "I have returned, demonstrating to him all my insecurity— Theon, if I go elsewhere and have to deal with it alone, it will be difficult and it will not be what I really desire, but I will know what awaits me. But what about you? How can I be sure?
He watched me with a surprised look, apparently did not expect that explosion.
"Samantha...
"Look, if I accept that and you decide later that you don't want to follow that much, or if your girlfriend doesn't like this story...
"That's not going to happen! I know you don't know me, but I'm not like that—he exclaimed alarmed—I would never abandon you at all.
I looked away, thinking about what he had said. Should I take the risk? What if it didn't work out? Could I start over somewhere else?
"Samantha, I understand that this is a big step and can cause insecurity. But do you already plan to move -- he started -- will it be so different so you start alone somewhere random to give me that chance?
He was right, was that a risk? Yes, it was a risk. But if my son was to have a father present, it might be worth it. I could try.
"All right," I sighed after a few moments.
" All right?
"Yes, I accept to move to Aspen," I agreed.