I rewatch the videos, everything from over two months ago. Nothing. The home camera doesn’t show Brianna or El or Sophia together. Regret ripples through me, I toss the laptop on the sofa. I should have put cameras in all the rooms instead of El’s alone, it made sense back then to do only hers. Propping the laptop on my lap, I rewind the video, pausing when a scene with El rushing into the bathroom comes up.
The timestamp on the lower part of the screen shows the video is less than a month ago, I almost skip it until I see it’s not the same from the night she fucked herself with a dildo. Anger stirs inside me, I exhale. El stops in front of the mirror, for a few minutes, she stands there, looking lost and scared. I tense when she moves to sit on the toilet seat. Burying her face in her palms, she bursts into tears. What happened?
Her trembling shoulders, matted hair and red eyes pull slightly at my heartstrings when she sits up to wipe the snot running down her nose, I cling to the anger trying to slip away and skip to another video. She can cry all she wants, I will never forgive her for keeping the news of Brianna away from me. Her and Sophia. My phone chimes with a text, I glance at the screen, looking away when Sophia’s name pops up. My fingers move over the keyboard, the scene changes to yesterday, minutes after I left the house.
El is pacing in her room, her fingers weave in and out of her hair, tears coat her lashes but they never fall. She stops in front of the portraits of us, I slam the laptop close and push it aside. Throwing my head back, my hands hang over the sofa and the throbbing ache in my chest spreads to all parts of my body.
Brianna spoke. She woke up. Running my fingers over my face, I sigh. I should be at work but I need closure.
“Daddy?” I open my eyes to the girls staring at me with concern. They are dressed in matching gowns with a big bow glued to the waist, spotting the same large stain from breakfast. I sit upright. “Are you sad?”
I stare at Wyn, she frowns. I am more than sad, I am hurt, angry and a lot of other things I can’t find the right word to describe. She slides to my laps to draw me in for a hug, when she pulls away, Bren takes over, pecking me loudly on my cheek. She wipes my eyes, I realise my cheeks are slightly wet with tears.
It feels like a lifetime ago since I cried. Since the dam broke, it has become easier but I don’t want to cry, I want to be strong for my girls. “Don’t cry, Daddy,” Bren says, Wyn supports with a nod. “Don’t be sad.” I hide my face in the crook of her neck, I can’t be sad with my girls around. I still have two of them. Alive and breathing without the aid of a machine. Vaguely registering Wyn’s arms on my neck, I stay like that for a while till I am certain my eyes will stop leaking. She taps me. “Is that why you did not go to work?”
I nod again. She wraps one hand around my neck and Wyn mimics her, resting their heads on my chest. Their presence smothers the anger growing inside me, I peck them. “When Bri spoke, what did she say?”
Desperation leaks from my voice, they peer at me and I manage to smile, I need to get my shit together. “We don’t know, she spoke only a little,” Bren answers, twiddling her fingers. “Is that why you’re sad?”
“Maybe. Do you want to go out?” They nod.
They are on a short break from school. Without consulting El, I decided they will spend the one month with me. No El, no Sophia. When Enzo doesn’t show up with them on Monday, she will find out, maybe lose her mind which I am counting on. My ability to care went down the drain with her useless apology.
Pushing them to their feet, I head to my room to change, they scurry in the opposite direction to do the same. I still have to be at the office today but I am the boss, I can go whenever I wish. I finish before them and wait outside their door. My phone vibrates, it’s a text from Dina with an update on Sophia.
“Yes, Medina?” I say into the phone as soon as she answers. She hesitates. “What is it?”
“She won’t leave until she sees you,” Dina murmurs. I pinch the bridge of my nose, close my eyes briefly to rein my emotions. What’s the point of having so many guards if they can’t get that pest out of the building? I must have spoken out loud because Dina replies, “The guards tried but she refuses to leave.”
The girls door opens, they run towards me, I end the call. “Do you want to follow Daddy to the office?”
Wyn giggles, I make a side note to keep her away from my part of the office. Bren nods and we all find our way to the garage. They sing along to the songs on the radio as the car glides down the empty road. Thankfully, nothing obscene comes up.
The giant Stark building comes into view, their singing stops and they splay their fingers on the window, staring in awe at the glass building while I park in the spot reserved for the CEO. Their giggles are welcome distraction, they hold hands, staying close to my side as we make our way to the entrance.
Sophia storms out of the door, her face is red with fury which immediately dissolves when she sees the girls. Putting a strange bottle away, she glares at me and throws a smile at the girls. Her fussing irritates me. When she carries Wyn to peck and ask her how she has been, I have to start a breathing exercise to stop myself from snatching my girls from her. She doesn’t deserve another moment with any of them.
“Girls, let’s go.” They release her amid grumbles. I ignore the greetings from Dina and the guards as we approach the elevator, I have it in mind to fire all of them for negligence. Sophia catches up to us, I dip my head a little so I can whisper into her ear, “I don’t want you coming close to me or my kids, okay?”
The elevator opens, the twins step in, I follow suit. “Aunt Sophia, are you not coming?”
“I will, Sweetie,” she says to Wyn without looking away from me. “I will use the other elevator.”
The click-clack of her high heels fades away, I can only hope the guards kick her out of the building now.
“Are you mad at Aunt Sophia?”
“Is that why you won’t let her come inside?”
“What did she do?”
Their questions bounce off the metallic wall, I wince. “Do you want to play a game?” I manage a smile, already pulling out my phone. El and I agreed they won’t be getting any gadgets for now but they are allowed to play with ours. They also have an iPad that’s strictly for house use alone. “The one you like...”
Successfully distracting them, I usher them into my office, leading the way to the door dividing my office from theirs. It’s not half as big as mine but it’s big enough for two girls to play without getting bored and it’s soundproof. A glass door for me to see what goes on inside separates us with a curtain for privacy.
The walls are lined with sofa they picked out, they settle down absentmindedly, eyes fixed on the game. I lean on their table, it’s smaller than mine with two swivel chairs for kids. “Girls.” They look up to me with smiles, I point to the telephone on their desk. “Remember, if you need anything. Anything at all...”
“Call Daddy,” they chorus. After kissing them, I arrange their toys without caring how much of a mess this place would be when they finish playing. It’s their office, they can do what they like. “Bye, Daddy.”
Sophia is seated when I step into the office, I take my seat behind the desk and bring out my laptop. I haven’t spoken to Jei, now will be a good time to call him. Or not. I arch a brow at the blondie sitting across me, we have been friends for years too many to count. More than El, she knows how it hurts.
Tired of our staring bout, I focus on the laptop and try to get Jei’s itinerary. He travelled this morning, maybe to brag about his Pokémon card. So far, he hasn’t mentioned the altercation with Vincent, I take it to be a good sign. “You asked them to kick me out of the building,” Sophia mumbles. I keep typing.
“But here you are,” I reply.
Something drops to the table with a soft thud, I frown at the bottle of pepper spray and she pulls her face into a mask. I should ask why she’s carrying that but again, I don’t care. “Good thing I brought this.”
“Good for you.”
Jei’s visiting New York first, I scroll through till I find what I need—his return date. In a week, I can wait.
“She wasn’t awake for very long,” Sophia whispers. My fingers stall briefly on the screen, she murmurs, “We were so shocked and excited, we forgot to call you. When we recovered, she was back to sleep.”
I lift a sheet from a file without meeting her gaze. Shock is understandable, I might have forgotten how to function if she woke in my presence but the key question still remains. “What happened to telling me after?” I deserved to know my daughter woke even if she was awake for only a minute or less. Sophia tries to speak, I cut her off before she comes up with an excuse. “Whose idea was it to keep it a secret?”
“El, but I wholeheartedly agreed with her decision. She was going to tell you later, I was going to.”
Leaning forward, I clasp my hands on the table. “When?” Silence greets my question, my fingers rap on the desk, I enunciate my question slowly, “When were either of you going to tell me, Sophia? When?”
Her gaze lowers to the table, I scoff. “I’m sorry.”
“No, you’re not. You knew. You helped me. We watched her together until El came into the picture.” Hurt crashes over me, my voice breaks but I don’t stop talking. “I have waited for how long now?” I raise my hands and my voice goes an octave higher. “Ten. Ten years and you are sorry?” I nod slowly, release a long breath and start shoving sheets into files. “Forgive me for being unable to accept your apology.”
“Brandon.”
A finger juts out in her direction. “Don’t.” El might have done it to punish me, that was wicked yet a bit understandable. But Sophia, she has always been on my team. I look up to see her still sitting and a new wave of anger washes over me. “Please, leave.” She tries to protest. “Leave while I am still being nice.”