CHAPTER 33. UNREQUITED LOVE?
RYDER
I checked again and the line hasn't disconnected. But neither of us said a word. Just our breaths caressed each other, and it's been over a minute!
I was fighting for the right words to say. I badly wanted to confirm that it was her, it felt too good to be true. But then again, I needed no confirmation. The flurry sound of her heartbeats was like a melody in my ears. They soothed me in the most surreal way and made me yearn for her all over again, more than I ever did.
Like a child who just got reunited with his parents, I wanted to break into tears. Vent to her all the pains and agony I've been through since the last time we spoke. I wanted to explain the ugly incident that had made the papers. So badly do I wanna explain my side of the story, just in case she believed the papers and thought of me as some cold-blooded psycho.
A trillion things needed to be said, but I couldn't bring myself to say them. Maybe Darius was right after all. Maybe she was some enchantress and had cast a spell on me. That should explain why I go so weak in the knees when she is near, or when I hear her voice.
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pick up the call. One minute I was holding the phone and the next minute it was ringing. I freaked out and I uh…“ She paused her rambling. She was nervous. I wasn't sure why. “Jason stepped out. If you could call him back, please?“
My jaw clenched at her words. Jason stepped out? Where the fuck were they? Certainly not the palace. Jason wouldn't take her there, except he's lost his goddamn mind.
Where the fuck did he take her to? And why was she with his phone? Jason would never release his phone to anyone, not even in his unconscious state.
What was he playing at? I didn't wanna go astray with my thoughts, but there was no denying that he was certainly not being one hundred percent transparent when it had to do with Hara.
“Ryder,“ His hushed voice pierced my thoughts. It seems he's been talking for a few seconds.
“Where the fuck did you go?!“ I snapped angrily, wanting to settle my doubts once and for all. “Nah, scratch that. Where the fuck are you?“
“Her house…“
My eyes shone in shock. I checked my wristwatch. It was a few minutes past ten. Was Jason really without any duties now that he would be over at her place so early?
“What are you doing there? It's too early for a visit,“
“Ryder, let's just talk when you get back. I could be in earshot. You don't want her finding out I'm your spy, do you?“
“For a spy, you do a pretty awful job. It's been days. No text. No messages. No updates. Do you find your job so thrilling that you can't afford to take a break even for a minute?“
“Ryder, c'mon…“
“Don't fucking try to downplay this. You and I, we're gonna talk when I get back. In the meantime, we need supplies.“
“Got it.“ he said. “Are you returning today?“
“Why? Pisses you off?”
“Dude, you're being funny right now,“
“Oh really?“ I chuckled dryly. “So you've been really good and I got no reason to act funny?“
“Ryder, c'mon…“ I could hear his breathing coming hard and fast. He was uneasy. Maybe he was in earshot. Can't risk Hara finding out he was my spy. I had to chill.
“She picked up your fucking call. Who does she think I am?“
“My boss.“
“Right. Get your mind ready. You have a lot of explanations to do when I get back.“ I said and hung up.
I thought my teeth were gonna crush into debris at how hard they were grinding against each other.
I couldn't bring myself to keep walking. I was fucked up with my overwhelming emotions. Certainly not in the right state of mind to go speak with Alpha Vince.
I turned around and headed back to the west wing where we were lodged. The guys were in chit chat but fell silent when they saw me.
“Ryder, something wrong?“ Darius asked.
“Get the cars ready. We're getting the hell out of here.“ I gestured at Frederick with my fingers and he came to me, slightly bowing his head. “You stay here and do your best. Send my apologies to Vince. Tell him something came up and I had to leave without seeing him,“
“Sure,“
“And…use a fucking condom. You don't wanna get one of these bitches pregnant, do you?“
'Coming from someone who's had a million sex without condoms.' Red chided.
My wolf was becoming a thorn in my flesh.
But it's true. I loved it raw. You know, the sleek feel of my dick against the insides of the pussies. But the ladies certainly had to be on pills, seeing I never got any pregnant, I mean, none that I heard of. They wouldn't come to me with sick stories like me being responsible for some bastard. I'd never buy such stories. They were hoes for a reason, fucking every dick that comes in sight. No way they would know who the father of the child is if they do take in. So if they do point fingers at anyone, it has to be the weakling who can't defend himself. Surely, I don't fall under that category. But Frederick was gullible in a way. I wouldn't want him trapped in such a shitty situation. Better safe than sorry.
The loud banging on the door got our heads snapping up. It was coming from a room and the yells that followed were Ciara's. Darius did lock her up.
He glanced my way and I gave him a curt nod. “ Go put our things in the car and wait there. I'll meet you outside with her.“
He nodded and left with the other warlords. I threw the door open and walked in, shutting it behind me.
“How dare you, Ryder?!“ She fumed, coming to me with her long nails sticking out to attack.
I was sure to catch her hands in the air before they did any damage to me. “You'll make a rather good witch, Ciara. What you do with your fingers is totally unbelievable,“
“I'm in no mood for your jokes! How dare you order him to burn my clothes?!“
I released her hands and she fell to the side. Almost immediately, she was back on her feet. “Take a step closer and I'll rip your eyes out. I'm fed up with you. So stay the fuck away from me if you don't wanna get hurt,“
“So it's true then?“ She gasped like she was terrified or something. “You turned into a psycho who just kills people at random,“
“Yeah, I guess so. Now, if you don't want me to show you how I do it, call up your media buddies and tell them to get the hell out of this premises. Or would you rather I make them leave?“
She shuddered in fright. Seems she's been reading a lot of the printed bullshit. She seems to have believed all she read too. I don't mind. The fear in her eyes was priceless. I wanted it to stay there for as long as possible.
She sent a quick text with her phone. “Done,“ she mumbled.
“Good, now let's get going…“
“Haven't you been watching the news?“ She cut me off.
“I have. You have no idea how badly I wanna smack your face for being such a goddamn liar.“
“All I did, everything I said out there was to protect you…“
“That's a fucking lie! You don't give a shit about me. All you care about is your fame and you're using me to get it!“
“Ryder…“
“This would be the last time you say my name in your shitty interviews. Do you hear me? The fucking last time!“
Being this close to her was testing my patience. I had to leave. I turned to leave.
“Why did you kill that man?“ her voice trembled. “Defending your sick act in front of the media doesn't mean I'm not terrified by it. Why would you run an innocent man over?“
If she was this terrified, what would Hara look like when she sees me? I didn't dare think about it. Just the thought of her trembling this much was lethal to my soul.
“If you think the rumors were true, then why did you defend me in front of the media?“ It was a rhetorical question that hinted at the fact that she was indeed using me for her fame.
I headed out and got into the car before she finally graced us with her presence. She rode in a different car, and I rode with the warlords.
Halfway through the journey home, Jay gave a loud, deafening laugh. He was the last of the warlords.
“Whoa, is Jason fucking serious right now?“ he asked, staring into his phone.
Usually, I tune out to their endless gossip and jokes. But right now, I was listening with all I had. It was Jason, I needed to hear it.
“Yeah, the dude is weird. He kept uploading shit last night that I feared he might have been hacked,“ Giveon chirped in.
Darius snorted. “Yeah, the jerk seems off. He went on and on like he'd been bitten…“
“By a love bug?“ Giveon added. They gave him a weird stare and he laughed. “I'm just saying. He was weird,“
“Yeah, especially when he quoted James Patterson.“
I froze. “James Patterson?“
“Yeah,“ Jay nodded. “Something about…“
“Unrequited love,“ I completed, looking out the window. The chills ran down my spine. Again, I tried to not let my thoughts go astray. But it's damn hard.
I did not know philosophers but it was Jason's favorite quote back when he had a fallout with the only woman I know he's ever loved.
I could still remember every line of the quote. Every bit of it.
Because what’s worse than knowing you want something, besides knowing you can never have it? - James Patterson
If Jason was quoting this again, then was he in another twist? With who?
I tuned out the guys, letting myself wallow in my depressing thoughts.