After Mindy was finished, the two girls went and put on their clubbing gear. Mindy wore a gold-colored top and black pants. She looked like a panther. Helen wore a light green dress that gathered over one shoulder and hung loosely over the other. Little beads were sewn artfully across it like a fairy had lost her balance over Helen’s head and dropped stars all over her. As she looked into the mirror in the bathroom, she thought she looked better than she’d ever looked for a date before. Even though she was dressed like Vera, she could still see herself peeking out through the facade.
When she and Mindy came out of the bathroom, Mark was waiting for them. To Helen, his expression was unfathomable, but Mindy seemed to think something when she saw him. If anything, it was as though Mindy understood something Helen did not.
“You look nice,” he said to Helen as he took her arm and led her toward the elevator.
Mindy hung outside as the doors closed, her feet firmly planted on the carpet.
“Wait, Mindy. Aren’t you coming too?” Helen called.
“Go on without me. I’ll catch a ride with Trevor,” she said and the elevator doors closed between them.
Then she and Mark were alone in the elevator as it went down. The air seemed too hot to Helen even though the building was air-conditioned. She felt like she was going to suffocate and the seconds seemed to be ticking backward. Would she ever get out?
“We need to talk,” Mark said at last.
“Okay,” Helen said. Her voice was like a drop of water falling into a sea, it could barely be heard.
“Do you want to blow off this party and come over to my place?”
“You kill me,” Helen said sarcastically.
“We need to talk and we can’t do it there. It’ll be too noisy.”
“Is that the Mark I know talking? It doesn’t seem like it. You see, the Mark I know wouldn’t skip out on a company event to be with his girlfriend. He wouldn’t even turn away a second girl when he’s already on a date if she’s part of the institution. Both his and his lover’s wants are completely unimportant compared to his professional obligations.”
“Really?”
“Yup,” she said, not sounding near chipper enough for the use of the word. “Besides, I can’t ditch. I promised Mindy I would be there. She really wants to be a makeup artist and it’ll make her look bad if I don’t show up. I think she’s planning on greasing some wheels tonight.”
“Who would be there to grease?” Mark asked incredulously.
“Trevor and Collin,” Helen answered smoothly. “She’s got to try her best, and I’m her cousin. I can’t leave her in the lurch. I love her.”
Just then the elevator opened and Helen and Mark stepped out.
“We can talk in the car,” Helen offered as she hurried ahead of him to the front doors of the building.
“You want to talk about London in the car?” Mark asked, rushing after her.
“I’m not going to London. I haven’t heard from Dominic since last night and if I do, I’ll let him outright I’m not going with him. I’d make a crappy model. My emotions are way too likely to get involved and I’d just get hurt over and over again. No thanks.”
“What about me?” Mark asked, grabbing both her shoulders and forcing her to face him.
“Oh yeah,” Helen said, trying to act like she was forgetting the smallest of details.
“I was going to tell you. I quit. I won’t be coming into work on Monday.”
“Why?” Mark said, seeking her eyes in the most sincere way.
“Because,” she said, trying to match his sincerity with venom. “We’re breaking up.”
“Because of London?”
“No,” Helen said licking her lips. “Because I won’t follow you there just to be your assistant.”
“You already said that.”
“And because,” she continued. “It’s impossible for me to be what you want.”
“I’ll tell you what I want.”
“I’m not interested,” she said, fighting off his hands and walking past him.
“What about what I don’t want? Cause I don’t want Vera!” he yelled after her.
Helen stopped in her tracks and turned around, “What did you say?”
“I said I don’t want Vera,” he breathed. “But you said you wouldn’t come to London with me as Helen.”
She nodded. She remembered saying that.
“You didn’t give me a choice,” he continued. “You said you would only come as Vera. I’m a pig, but I wanted to have the job and you. I thought if I offered you the same job as my assistant in London then you could come and we could date longer, because… I wasn’t ready for more." He ran his hand through his hair and started pacing the empty atrium. His footsteps echoed on the floor. “And I didn’t think you were, either. But then you said I’d have to make a big sacrifice in order to even get Vera. I thought that meant you wanted me to ask you to marry me if you were going to come. And… What am I talking about? You two are the SAME PERSON.”
Helen didn’t know what to say. When she thought over their conversation it definitely seemed like a marriage proposal was what she was hinting towards. She colored because she wasn’t sure that was what she meant.
“Anyway, I don’t care,” Mark said noisily. “We never get any time alone no matter how hard I chase you. There always appears to be someone waiting in the wings as soon as one of us has a few minutes. Even as we speak, Mindy and Trevor are on their way down and so we won’t be alone in here for longer than a minute." He paused and took a deep breath. Then he said rationally, “I just thought if we moved to a city where neither of us knew anyone we might have a chance to actually get to know each other. But it’s impossible. In London, I’ll know Trevor and apparently, you’ll know Dominic and he’s going to be impossible to shake. And let’s face it, wherever you go you are going to attract a string of admirers. And so now you’re breaking up with me. Maybe that’s well and good since I have no idea how to make you happy.”
Everything he said surprised Helen. He sounded like he really wanted to be with her.
“Mark, we have so many problems,” she said, trying to be sensible. “But let’s deal with them one at a time. I have always felt you cared more deeply for me when I was pretentious than when I was sincere. That bothers me a lot.”
Mark stopped pacing and faced her. “Are you trying to give yourself a multiple personality disorder? I mean really, both people are you. So, you don’t want to be flirty and done up twenty-four-seven. Who could really blame you for that? But, when I first met you, you didn’t seem fake to me.”
Helen sighed, “That’s because I really liked you.”
Mark perked up like he was getting an idea. Then he said, “And on Valentine’s Day when you flirted with Dominic? You were flirty then, too.”
Helen dropped her hands in surrender. “That’s because you were there and I knew you wanted to be out with me instead of Laura because you’d made a bid for me as well. So, I thought I’d make you jealous if I hung all over Dominic.”
“So, if you act like that for those reasons, then what part of you is faking it?” he asked logically.
“But I—”
Mark interrupted, “You felt like flirting and you did. How is that pretentious? Just because you had the cover of being an escort, you didn’t have to take responsibility for
your actions. Did you tell yourself it was just for the job? Is that what caused all of this?”
“I don’t know,” Helen whined, frustrated. “I don’t care. What I really want is for you to like me whether I decide to dress up to the nines or not, whether I decide to be all bouncy or if I want to be serious. I want to be smeared with mud and have you still think I'm cute.”
“That’s it?” he asked disbelievingly. “Done!” he exclaimed coming toward her and looking meaningfully into her eyes. “You are wonderful on your own. You’re fun enough without the flare. Whether you’re chucking your bra padding at me, or falling asleep with an open can of pop in your hand, or throwing underwear onto the highway— or whatever—whining, screaming, crying, sleeping—I want it all. Even when you’re just sitting at your desk doing your paperwork, you are what I want. So, don’t break up with me, Helen. I love you. Please give me a chance to work it out with you.”
“You love me?” she gasped.
“Of course I do. I’m sorry it’s taken me this long to say it,” he said, pulling her hand to his heart. “I’ve loved you from the first. Just please, stop driving me crazy and stay with me.”
Helen felt like she was going to cry, but she kept on being sensible and asked quietly, “What about London? That’s the next problem.”
“Do you want to go?”
“No,” she said, allowing her head to droop.
“Then, that’s all you needed to say. I won’t go either,” he said, kissing the palm of her hand.
“But, once-in-a-lifetime opportunities don't come along very often,” Helen said, letting a tear slide down her cheek.
Mark cupped her face in his palm. “No. They don't,” he said gently, looking at her like she was the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity he didn't want to miss out on.
“Okay, Mark. I’ll stay. I won't quit,” she said.
He pulled her into his arms and kissed her adoringly. Her hands were still on his chest and she felt his heart thudding madly against his rib cage. And for the first time, something miraculous happened. She felt like he really did love her for who she was instead of for who she wasn’t.
“Do you think we should try to sneak past them,” a soft voice said at the other end of the atrium.
“No,” a male voice answered. “Let’s wait until they’re finished.”
Helen thought Mark heard the voices, but he just kept on kissing her and making the world around her swirl. Helen could hardly pay attention to what they were saying, but through her daze, she could make out a little of their conversation.
“Well, if they made up then I should make some calls,” Mindy’s gentle voice said.
“Why?”
“Well, I was going to have some of my escort buddies come and help Helen save a little face since she was supposed to be brokenhearted tonight. You know, all my male escort buddies.”
“You’re a good friend,” Trevor said kindly.
“No, I’m blood. There’s nothing like developing a little bit of a mob mentality when your family’s pride is threatened.”
“I certainly know what you mean,” Trevor chuckled. “But doesn’t it look good to see them? When was the last time you were kissed like that, Mindy?”
“I don’t really remember. It might have been yesterday, but I’ll tell you one thing, it didn’t take roots like that.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” Trevor said, right before Helen heard a gasp from the other end of the room.
She and Mark looked up to see Trevor kissing Mindy. Her cell phone had fallen onto the marble tile.
“Maybe they should do the commercial,” Mark drawled before he kissed Helen again.