Jaymes Young - Whats is love
(Listen to the song)
One month later
My toy had been too quiet, once in a while I saw how her beautiful clear eyes were staring at nothing but I know that they were thinking of something hidden to me.
Our nights of crazy sex were getting rarer and rarer, being Don took up my time and so did the arranged marriage. Each time I needed to hear Nina's voice, the sicker I became, the girl is a damned alienated woman who, because of her upbringing, has become a petty and often crazy woman to keep up appearances.
It was logical that the marriage would be forever and ever, but I couldn't expect that I would feel so much like shooting that imbecile in the middle of the forehead.
My toy on the contrary took advantage of every moment to become more astute than she already is, she read everything she saw in front of her and it was even possible to have a pleasant conversation with her without even seeming tedious or cloying as it was with Nina.
After two weeks without seeing her I was already going crazy when I decided to go to the mansion, my toy was wearing a beautiful printed and long dress, she didn't notice my presence but I didn't stop admiring her for a minute. My toy was happy while looking at the pool in the mansion, something good was going on in her mind and I was curious to know the reason for her happiness.
- I would give half the money I own just to know the reason for your happiness, my toy!
- You don't need that much money, sir, today is my birthday, I'll be 19!
She had said it was close but she hadn't said it would be this month. My toy kept smiling, happy to be turning another year of life, looking at the horizon while the sun was giving its last signs of light.
- You should have told me that day, I would have bought a beautiful present for you, my toy, I asked you to give me the list of books you wanted but you didn't give it to me or ask for anything as a present!
- Sir, don't worry, I'm fine, I just want a present, since you can't let me out for security reasons, there's something I'd like very much!
Her eyes remained focused on the horizon, never straying from that view, she was stranger than last time as if she were farther away from me and from all that we are.
- Say, my toy, today is your birthday, you can ask for anything you want!
- I want you to stay for dinner, not call me your toy for one day just refer to me as Cecilia and the last request is that you make love to me! I want to get a glimpse of what my life would be like if I wasn't who I am, if I was a normal girl and not a toy in your hands. Just for one day afterwards everything would go back to the way it was before.
That request was quite unexpected, I would never have imagined that my toy would want such a thing but I said I would give the gift, so I will do it. I took his hand like never before, feeling the shiver that my touch gave him on his skin. We went to the dining room that was already properly prepared, there was everything I liked on the table as if she knew that I missed the attention to please me that only she has.
- Cecilia, how did you know I would accept?
- Dario, you know as well as I do that our relationship will end. There is no doubt or mistake about it, just a sad realization that I am nothing more than a worthless mistress. That is why you agreed to give me this gift, because you know you will have to get rid of me sooner or later, I know that the rest of my life will be lived inside some whorehouse, but first I want to know what it would be like if I didn't know what my future would be.
Sometimes, despite being a monster, Cecilia scared me with the conclusions she drew without even knowing my actions. Unfortunately, my father had already warned me about the fact that I had a steady mistress in my mansion outside the city, about possible bastards, and even the fact that Valentine had already commented on the fact that he had bought a girl to satisfy my dirty desires.
Cecilia waited until I was seated and began to serve me a generous portion of garlic and oil noodles, poured the wine into my glass and smiled as she also served herself. The dinner was delicious, as was the chocolate mousse that she made so well. We began to talk as usual, I was missing our conversations, especially her company.
- Dario, how many children do you want to have?
She surprised me with this question, Cecilia had never been so direct in relation to my personal life. We talked about all kinds of subjects but not about me.
- I never wanted to be a father, children are a weakness in the life of a man like me, but since I know I need a son to replace me, I want it to be just one, and preferably a boy!
- I understand! I always wanted to be a mother, I wouldn't do like my mother who abandoned me in an orphanage, I would take care of my baby, I would be the best mother in the world and I would be very happy having a family to take care of and love as long as I live. I wouldn't care if it was a boy or a girl, I would love one or the other just the same, children are blessings, I don't agree with your statement that they are weaknesses for a powerful man like you, I believe they can be a refuge from the bad world I have lived in but that is none of my business, how is your fiancée?
Since the engagement, I haven't told her about the wedding to Nina Valentine, but Cecilia is not stupid, on the contrary, she is extremely intelligent and smart, noticing the ring she was wearing on her finger.
- Unbearable, petty and loves to live for appearances. Nina Valentine is definitely just a means to something bigger.
- You should give her a chance, after all, she will be the mother of your son and wife for the rest of your life.
Cecilia was able, despite being so young, to have enormous wisdom, something only hers and no one else's.
- I don't like to think that I'll have to get married.
- But you will get married, besides, you need to get over what happened, you let the past make you change the way you see the world and people, this is really very sad, I feel for you but I feel more for me.
She seemed sad, but Cecilia didn't know what it was like to trust and love someone and then be thrown into a sea full of betrayal, lies and deceit. She is just a girl who serves only to satisfy me and nothing more.
- What do you know about the world and people, Cecilia? If you've never left Nicolas' house or here? Don't say things you don't know, or about situations you haven't lived, if you hadn't been bought by me you would certainly be being raped by Nuno Tolentino or by all his soldiers, you are a fool and a smart ass.
Cecilia just smiled without defending herself from everything I said, picking up the dinner dishes and going to the kitchen, returning with the same smile as before standing in front of me with the same haughty look as always.
- Sometimes I think about my life with a lot of sadness but also with joy. Sadness because I will not be able to know and live everything I want and joy because I am not and never will be like you, in fact I think I am better. Don't take it as my presumption, because it is not! Just a statement, you will be eternally stuck to an unhappy past being this bitter and lonely man, even though you are surrounded by so many people, some things never change but I believe that many don't change because of the choices we have, you chose to be a monster, and I'm sure you are still like that because you want to be and you like it.
In a moment of rage I pushed Cecilia's body hard against the wall holding her neck so tight I could easily break it. She stared at me as if she expected this reaction, as if she wanted to die just as I squeezed her delicate neck.
- What's the matter with you today? You're facing me like you're not afraid to die, I let you think you could say and do anything but don't think you can, you're just some bitch, understand your place once and for all, and know that your opinion like you is nothing to me.
I let go of her neck as she tried to breathe despite the difficulty, her eyes had not admired or adored me as they had before and now even less. I could see her disappointment, hurt and resentment but couldn't understand why, Cecilia had always known her place in my life but now she no longer seemed to want to occupy that position. She simply stood up and looked right into my eyes as if she could in that way say what she already knew: it's over.
- When will you get rid of me?
Her coldness in saying that hit me in a way that I didn't like. A shiver ran through my body, that horrible feeling of loss was settled in my chest, a feeling I never thought I would feel again.
- Tomorrow!
I didn't want to look at her anymore, knowing that she didn't adore me as she used to, that she didn't have that beautiful shine in her beautiful eyes. Cecilia took off her shoes, then her dress along with her underwear, getting totally naked, I never imagined that getting rid of her as she put it would be so terrible.
- Give me the last part of the present: make love to me!
As if we hadn't argued a few minutes ago and tried to hang her, Cecilia came to me with the same haughty and light posture that only she has, smiled at me sweetly kissing my forehead, then both sides of my face finishing by kissing my mouth like a girl who had never done that but we had kissed so many times, it's strange this feeling I have in my chest as if this were our first real time or our last, I didn't know how to describe it well.
- What is happening to us, Cecilia?
- We are going to do something we have never done, and because I love you as I never thought I would love a man in this life but this is our secret, something mine and yours, no one else's, can you keep this secret, Dario Albertini?
Cecilia smiled as she hugged me as if she was telling me something too important to keep, but I didn't know what I really felt. I loved only one woman, and I was betrayed, but with Cecilia I didn't know how to describe what I felt, because I no longer knew what love was, that feeling destroyed me once, for what reason should I believe that it won't destroy me again?
- I don't love you!
- I know, but just promise me that you will keep this secret, it's only ours, keep it inside your mind, since you no longer have a heart capable of loving again.
Her head was still resting on my shoulder, when I took her on my lap, that feeling of goodbye was in my chest as if I would never see my beautiful toy again. As I walked towards the playroom, I felt her hands gripping my shoulder with a certain amount of strength.
- Not here, not today, make love to me in my room, please!
I decided to heed her request, going in the opposite direction; we both knew that this would be our last time. There was no reason not to do her will, she kissed my neck thanking me for not wanting to have her in the usual room.
I laid her beautiful body on the bed looking at every detail of that place so hers, the organized books, the impeccably arranged dresser, everything in this room reminds me of her and her way of being. I stripped off my clothes and then lay down beside her admiring every part of her, savoring that moment with her.
- This will be our last time, won't it?
I just nodded, it seemed as if I didn't want to say anything, just to feel everything she represented to me, for the first time I wanted to be different from the man I am so that I could be with her instead of Nina, but I couldn't. I couldn't be different from the man I am.
- I love you, Dario Albertini, forever I will love you, my heart will forever be yours.
Cecilia clung to me like an inexperienced woman as if with every touch and kiss she gave me she was trying to discover my body, I taught her how to please me but I never pleased Cecilia as a woman while she kissed me getting closer and closer to my cock I held her face affectionately, as I had never done before preventing her from sucking my cock as she did so well.
It was my turn to idolize her body, I kissed every part of her as she did me trying to discover her secrets, feeling the shivering of her skin wanting to hear my name in her mouth as I entered her but it wasn't the time yet.
I had to give her her present, so while caressing her thighs I slowly open her legs having the beautiful view of her wet pussy and all mine, she doesn't know how I'm loving having this view.
I continue with my kisses now on her thighs until I reach her intimacy, I had never sucked her pussy but my beautiful toy wanted to make love to me and that included giving her pleasure.
I had always been a man concerned with my own pleasure, during all these months I had taught Cecilia to serve and give pleasure only to me but today would be different, everything would be different.
- What are you doing?
She became curious and raised her head to observe as I continued with my intentions between her legs, I put my tongue on her pleasure point listening to Cecilia moan like crazy feeling the pleasure I could give her just by sucking and licking her pussy.
- Please, I can't take any more!
I didn't let Cecilia cum only because I wanted it to happen with my cock inside her so without her realizing it I entered her hard, I couldn't be tender seeing my slut wet and thirsty for me. My cock and her tight pussy have a perfect fit as if one completed the other, all that night I loved her body and Cecilia mine.
When we finished, exhausted from loving each other so much, Cecilia closed her eyes and slept peacefully as if she wasn't afraid of what awaited her. I could no longer stay here looking at my beautiful toy, I could never love Cecilia and I would throw her into some whorehouse where she would be used, subjugated and I would never forgive myself, maybe this is better. I prefer that Cecilia hate me, than have love for me but why did it seem that I would regret bitterly what I am about to do?