"Alex. Hey. Come on. What are you thinking about!"
Billy snapped me out of my thoughts. What is happening to me? How could I imagine something dirty just by seeing his sexy butt? I think I need to replace my brain immediately.
"Are you okay?" Billy asked, looking at me suspiciously. I hope he doesn't think anything weird about me.
"I'm fine," I replied, pretending to fasten my seatbelt. I was too embarrassed to look at Billy's face right now.
While on the road, my phone vibrated. Mia sent me a message. Mia has been my friend since college. However, since our last meeting, I started to keep my distance from her.
Mia: Alex, do you have time next week?
Alex: What's the occasion?
I started to be wary of this conversation. My tone was slightly down. I don't know, I just remember the last meeting. It was painful and traumatic for me.
Mia: It's my kid's birthday, and I want to invite you.
Alex: I think I have an event at the office. You know, I'm just a messenger in this office.
It's better if I avoid Mia's invitation. Besides, I'm not sure about my mental condition. Am I ready to face other friends?
Mia: Sarcastic. You're always like that. Everyone knows you're the most serious among us.
Mia's tone sounded regretful. In my heart, I was glad that Mia felt that way. At least I don't have to mention explicitly that I was hurt by their jokes last time.
Alex: Forgive me. Maybe I'm just jealous of your family.
Mia: Forgive us too, Alex. We promise not to joke about your personal matter again.
Alex: Okay.
I was silent for a moment. I remembered how Stevan, Mia, and Nate joked about my single status. Their jokes about being frigid honestly hurt me. I know I'm beautiful, sexy, and smart. But if they make fun of my introverted attitude and turn it into a joke, it makes my emotions rise too.
Mia: So, can you come?
Mia: I promise to shut Nate and Evan's mouth this time. I think they also understand that you're angry.
I thought again. I have to prove to them that I have a boyfriend. I don't want to leave any openings for them to mock me.
Alex: Yes. Why not? I'll come.
Mia: Great. Can't wait.
I smiled and ended our conversation when Billy spoke. "Do you have a date?" he asked.
"Huh? Me? A date?"
"Yes. Why do you look nervous like that?"
"No. It wasn't a guy. It was just Mia, my friend." As I answered him, Billy nodded his head a few times.
"Is she as sexy as you?"
What? Did he just say that I was sexy out loud?
"I guess," I replied, looking at Billy's face intensely.
"I want... us. I want us to-"
"We have arrived, Billy!" I said as I saw Mr. White's gate in front of us.
"Oh, yeah." I don't know why, but I felt like Billy wanted to say something to me. However, I didn't have time to imagine anything else because Mr. White was certainly more important than my curiosity about Billy's words.
"You will lead this interview."
I was stunned and couldn't believe it. Billy gave me this opportunity.
"Are you sure?" I asked to make sure.
"Yes. I will record it for you," replied Billy without looking at me.
"What if I mess it up?" I suddenly lacked confidence given this opportunity by Billy.
Billy stopped and turned to face me.
"I'm sure you won't risk your career just like that, right?" Billy answered with a sharp look. He was back to being the polar man. The Billy I knew.
"S-Sure. I won't let you down."
"Yes. You should!"
Finally, we started the interview smoothly. At first, I felt nervous, but Mr. White's humor made it seem easy.
"I hope we can collaborate, Miss Alex. Would you like to?" Mr. White asked while patting my back.
"Oh my God. I'd love to, Sir! I will follow your instructions well." I replied enthusiastically. Anyway, this opportunity would never come twice. Just being on Mr. White's team would surely make me known and proud.
"I will contact you soon." Mr. White smiled kindly.
"Thank you, Naughty Boy!" Mr. White said while punching Billy's wrist.
"Awww... that hurts, Uncle!"
I was shocked when Billy called him Uncle. Was Mr. White really his uncle?
"Didn't this naughty child tell you, Miss Alex?" Mr. White said when he saw my shocked face.
I was confused by the reality that happened before my eyes. Billy and Mr. White? That means Billy is equally extraordinary. His uncle even won a Pulitzer, how about Billy? I didn't know who Billy really was.
"Our plan worked, Uncle!" Billy said while laughing with his uncle.
"Forgive this mischievous child, Miss Alex. He's just like that." Mr. White hugged Billy to say goodbye while asking about Billy's mother, who was Mr. White's sister.
Meanwhile, I just watched their togetherness and took a picture of it. A rare sight. Behind that cold face, it turned out that Billy could also be warm. Suddenly I felt guilty for calling Billy the Polar Alien.
After saying goodbye, we returned to the office with different feelings. I made sure that this meeting opened up new insights into Billy and also as a writer.
"Is something bothering you?" Billy asked, breaking my daydreaming.
"I just can't believe you and Mr. White. I was at a loss for words."
Billy looked at me with a sweet smile. Actually, this was the first time I had seen him smile sweetly. In front of me. I feel flattered now.
God, please stop my brain from being full of Billy's naked body.
"Little by little, you'll know that I'm not a Polar Alien!"
Ouch!
I immediately started and covered my face with my hands. I was sure that all this time Billy knew that I liked to tease him as a Polar Alien when I was with Margareth.
"Hahaha... you're like a boiled crab. You look delicious to eat."
I turned to him while pouting my lips. I saw him laughing and his voice was even more teasing now.
Unconsciously, I kept looking at him without stopping. Somehow, my hand was suddenly holding his hand freely. I saw that hand circling mine with its width. My small hand sank. I'm not that tall, so my hand size is also small. He took my hand towards his thigh and ended up at his reddish lips. He kissed the back of my hand repeatedly until I closed my eyes.
"Alex. Alex... are you daydreaming again?"
Billy's call made me flinch. Was I daydreaming about Billy again? Damn, he must think I'm a weird girl for catching me daydreaming twice. I feel like a horny woman now.
"What? Is there something?"
"What were you daydreaming about? Be honest with me!" he asked, turning his car into a road inside the forest. I don't know where we are right now. However, I admit that this place is very beautiful with a row of Mahogany trees neatly arranged.
Billy stopped the car and stared at me intensely.
"Are we lost?" I asked.
"No. I just want us to rest for a while." He continued to stare at me with focus. Making my heart pounding. His blue eyes made me speechless. And I really don't like this feeling.
I looked down and saw my own hand to divert Billy's gaze.
"So, what were you really daydreaming about? Twice, if I'm not mistaken."
My story has come to an end. What should I say to him? I can't possibly tell him that I'm thinking about him. Imagining it more precisely. Imagine how sexy and handsome he is.
"I think I'll be more embarrassed if I tell you honestly. We're not that close to be honest about each other's thoughts." I answered honestly.
"Do you want to try it? At least you'll know that I got this position at the publisher not because of my uncle or anyone else."
"I'm not thinking in that direction, although many of my friends think so. Anyway, I respect you because you're my boss."
"Just that? Just a boss?"
I wanted to guess the other way by Billy's way of speaking. But I didn't want to be disappointed and make myself look like a frustrated woman.
"I'm not expecting much. If that's what you meant."
"Do you have a boyfriend?"
"Unfortunately not," I answered while taking off my glasses.
"So, was the daydream just to satisfy your fantasies?" Billy asked, leaning his head on the seat and still looking at me. He hid his smile with his finger.
"Looks like you can guess what happened. I'm sorry. I hope you don't feel offended." His gaze weakened me.
"Hahaha. Silly you. So how? I hope I'm good at it."
"Don't think so far, Billy," I avoided. I was really embarrassed, and Billy looked like he was really enjoying my current situation.
"Why don't we make it come true?"
"What do you mean?"
"We can do it in the back," Billy replied, pointing in the direction behind the steering wheel with his eyes.
"Trust me. I'm a normal woman who can misinterpret your words, Billy!" Unconsciously, I threatened him with a hidden passion.
He smiled again and it made me fall deep because as I said before, HE IS FUCKING HOT.
"I think we're mature enough to decide. If we're compatible, we can continue it. Outside of the office, of course."
"Are you like this with other women? Or am I just easy because I'm in my 30s and single?"
"To be honest. I only see you as a sexy Italian woman and coincidentally a writer that I know is very good." Billy played with his eyes. Oh God, he's flirting with me. I know he's flirting with me right now.
"Oh. I know this type of pick-up line. A little old school," I teased back.
"I feel comfortable talking to you." Billy said, taking my free hand and hooking it.
I looked at him and closed my eyes, hoping this wasn't just a daydream. I opened my eyes and saw Billy was still holding my hand. This is real. FUCKING REAL.
He immediately moved to the back seat and pulled me along. Just as I imagined. I sat on his lap and felt how his eyes were already full of desire. While I was still thinking about whether I should continue this or not. Although my mind forbids it, my body betrays me. Slowly but surely, I kissed him. Slowly and not demanding. Just making sure we were here for the same purpose.
"What's next?" I asked. I didn't actually want to ask. But I just wanted to know what his plan was.
"What do you want actually?" Billy asked with his piercing gaze. Can I tell him what I want when he only wants sex with me?
"Maybe a relationship." I regretted my answer. Why couldn't my tongue hold it for a moment? After this, I'm sure he will stay away.
"Without a trophy?"
"Oh please, I'm a woman. Not a teenager."
Billy didn't answer anymore because he was busy nibbling on my lips and sucking them hard. "We're mature enough to see where this relationship is going," Billy said, still pushing my waist down. Without saying anything, we satisfy each other.
To be honest, I'm weak when it comes to this. I admit that I crave a man's touch. I don't know what makes me fail in relationships. It has been proven in the last few years. I have never been involved with any man and only had sex once with a man I met in a bar.
***
When I got home, I immediately lay down. I can say that today drained a lot of my energy. After the interview, ending with having sex with Billy? It was totally expected. His fit and sturdy body didn't disappoint at all. He managed to make me orgasm without much effort. I'm sure I won't refuse to have sex with him again.
Tring ...
I looked at my phone and saw one notification from the dating app where I am a member.
"DM-Owe? I feel like I've read that before."
I decided to start a conversation with him after seeing his profile pic.
"Hi, my name is Oliver. Your profile pic looks natural. And I like your dog."
DEG ...
DEJAVU
I've experienced this before ...
"Hi too. You can call me Alex. You like my dog?"
"Yes. He is cute."
"He is indeed."
I fell silent ... the same words. I remember them. For God's sake, I remember them, this was my dream back then. This is real. If I'm not mistaken ... he will ask me out on a date after this.
"I'm not good at small talk. I'm just an adult man who wants to date you."
Damn ...
This is happening. It's true ... slowly I shudder just thinking about it. Will the next thing really happen? Just like that dream?
No...
No...
I guess it won't be that easy to believe in a dream. It's just a dream that I have to prove.
"Alright. Brown Cafe tomorrow at 9pm. Can you make it?" And I decided to go along with it.