"Where are we going, Xanthos?" I asked him when I finally calmed down a bit.
Xanthos held my hand and gently gripped it while driving. His eyes remained on the road. We're currently in his car, trying to stay away from everything. Maybe this is really what I need right now.
"Where do you want to go?" He glanced at me. "I'll take you wherever you want."
I bit my lower lip and sighed. "I want somewhere near the sea," I mumbled.
I always go to a private beach whenever I'm having a hard time. It makes me feel a little bit better. My hands are still shaking right now, the calm sea is what I need.
"I have a yacht, do you want us to go there?" he asked and kissed my hand. He loves doing that, I don't know why.
Tipid na ngumiti ako saka tumango. That's not a bad idea.
Tahimik na tumingin na lang ako sa mga nadadaanan naming gusali. Wala akong lakas na magsalita. Mukhang naiintindihan naman ni Xanthos 'yon dahil tahimik lang din siya sa tabi ko pero hinahawakan n'ya pa rin ang kamay ko na para bang pinapakalma n'ya ako kahit papa'no.
I just quietly waited for us to reach our destination. I badly want to text Abi to let her know I wasn't at the party anymore but I don't have strength to do so.
Makalipas ang halos kalahating oras na biyahe, nakarating din kami sa pupuntahan namin.
"Kiara, we're here," Xanthos announced when he stopped the engine.
Agad na lumabas ng kotse si Xanthos at pinagbuksan ako ng pinto. Agad n'yang hinawakan ang kamay ko na para bang inaalalayan ako. Tipid na ngumiti na lang ako sa kanya.
"Can you walk? Do you want me to carry you?" Xanthos asked.
I shook my head. "I can manage."
Sinalubong kami ng lalaking sa tingin ko ay isa sa mga bodyguard ni Xanthos.
"Sir, ready na po ang yacht," sabi ng lalaki.
Xanthos nodded. "Thank you."
Napatingin ako sa malaking yacht na nasa harapan namin ngayon. It looks like a very expensive yacht. It's also incredibly huge unlike the typical yachts that I've seen.
"Cerniah," I murmured when I saw the name of his yacht.
Xanthos smiled at me. "Cerniah is my mother."
I smiled at him too. He's a sweet son.
Sumakay na kami sa yacht. Medyo kinakabahan ako dahil ito ang unang beses na nakasakay ako sa ganitong kalaking yate. Pero tila nawawala ang kaba ko sa tuwing pinipisil nang marahan ni Xanthos ang kamay ko.
"This won't sink, right?" I asked him.
Xanthos let out a refreshing laugh. "Of course not, baby." He kissed my forehead lightly.
Umakbay siya sa 'kin, yumakap naman ako sa baywang n'ya. Nararamdaman ko na kaagad ang malamig na hangin. Pasimple akong tumingin sa ibaba para makita ang dagat. Hindi ko na masyadong makita ang dagat dahil gabi na pero nagliliwanag ang dagat mula sa liwanag ng buwan. Ang ganda tingnan no'n, nakakakalma ng sistema.
"You can take a shower first, I have extra clothes here that you can wear," Xanthos said and caressed my hair.
Xanthos guided me inside the yacht. There's two rooms here and there's also a bathroom. He prepared a shirt and shorts for me. He also ordered his secretary to buy underwear for me which I found uncomfortable but I just let him be. I need those anyway.
Hindi ko alam kung gaano katagal akong nag-stay sa bathroom. Pakiramdam ko inabot na 'ko ng mahigit dalawang oras. Napilitan lang akong tapusin at lumabas dahil nakailang katok na si Xanthos at mukhang nag-aalala na.
Nagbihis na ako ng damit na inihanda n'ya, si Xanthos naman ang sumunod na nag-shower kaya lumabas na muna ako ng silid para tingnan ang buwan at dagat. Halos sumakit na yata ang mga mata ko dahil sa pag-iyak. Hindi ko na maalala ang huling beses na umiyak ako nang ganito katindi. Hanggang ngayon nga ay mabigat pa rin ang dibdib ko.
I want to call Dad right now and ask him about that woman, Paula. But if I do that, it means I'm doubting myself as Akira North's daughter. She's my mother and no one else. I know she's just mad that's why she said that. I'm her daughter, I shouldn't doubt that.
I was taken aback when I felt a warm embrace behind me. Amoy pa lang alam ko na kung sino 'yon. Tipid na napangiti na lang ako at napahawak sa braso ni Xanthos.
"You can tell me what's bothering you. I can't give you the help you need but I will listen to you and I won't leave you." He kissed my hair and hugged me tighter.
"Your presence is enough, Xanthos. Thank you for your efforts," I mumbled.
Saglit kaming natahimik habang nakatitig sa dagat. Napapakalma ako ng dagat dagdag pa ang mainit na yakap ni Xanthos. Alam kong hindi ko matatakasan ang problema ko pero gaya ng sabi ni Xanthos, dapat ko munang ipahinga ang isip ko sa lahat at bumalik nang mas matatag.
Natigilan lang kami nang kumalam ang sikmura ko. Agad na nag-init ang mukha ko. Natatawang pinaharap naman ako ni Xanthos sa kanya.
"I think you should eat first, baby," he muttered and kissed my lips.
Napaismid na lang ako saka tumango. Inakbayan na lang n'ya ako at muling iginiya pabalik sa loob. Hanga na talaga ako sa laki ng yacht na 'to. Mas malaki pa ang espasyo nito sa loob kaysa sa tinuluyan kong unit noon.
Nakarating kami sa dining area pero agad akong natigilan at napahawak sa damit ni Xanthos nang may makita akong lalaking nakain do'n.
"What the fuck are you doing here, Xceron?" nakakunot-noong tanong ni Xanthos.
"Eating... obviously," tipid na sabi ng lalaki na tinawag ni Xanthos na Xceron.
I stared at the man intently. He looks like a slightly younger version of Xanthos. I blinked twice and stared at him again... don't tell me he's...
"He's my younger brother, Xceron Archante," Xanthos said.
I gulped and nodded. No wonder Xceron looks like him a lot. I think the only difference between them is their hair. Xceron is not curly-haired like Xanthos. I think Xanthos is a little bit taller than him. But it seems like he's colder and more intimidating than Xanthos.
"H-Hello, Xceron. I'm Kiara North," I said and smiled awkwardly at him.
Xceron didn't say anything, he didn't even look at me. I just sighed and bit my lower lip. It seems like he's a rude guy.
"Xceron," Xanthos said in a warning tone. I just held his arm and shook my head.
"It's fine," I mumbled and smiled at him.
"I'm done," Xceron announced and immediately stood up.
Naiwan kaming dalawa ni Xanthos sa dining area. Napailing na lang si Xanthos at iginiya ako paupo sa upuan.
"I'm sorry about him. He's worse than me when it comes to communicating with people. I'll kick him out of this yacht later," he said and caressed my hair.
I chuckled. "You can't kick him out now."
"Wala akong pakialam kahit malunod siya," dagdag pa ni Xanthos.
Muli akong natawa at hinampas ang braso n'ya. "Baliw ka."
Xanthos smiled and pinched my cheeks. He looks satisfied and happy seeing me laugh.
"I'll cook for you. But you know that menudo is the only food I can cook, right?" he asked and scratched his nape.
"It's fine. I really like your menudo." I caressed his cheek and kissed his lips softly.
He held my hand and kissed it before he stood up and went to the kitchen counter. Napatitig na lang ako sa kanya habang nagsisimula na siyang magluto. Tipid na napangiti na lang ako. Maybe I should really attend a cooking class.
Nakatitig lang ako sa kanya buong oras habang nagluluto siya. Watching him cook is more entertaining than watching dramas.
Agad n'ya akong pinaghain matapos n'yang magluto. Napapangiti na lang ako habang pinapanood ang bawat kilos n'ya. Pakiramdam ko ang swerte ng magiging asawa n'ya.
Alam ko namang mahal namin ang isa't isa ngayon pero hindi naman ibig sabihin no'n, kami pa rin sa huli. Maraming pwedeng mangyari... But of course, I'm hoping that he's the one for me until the end because I can't imagine myself with another man.
Umupo na ulit si Xanthos sa tabi ko matapos n'yang maghain. Agad kong tinikman ang niluto n'ya at napangiti na lang ako nang matikman ko ang masarap na lasa no'n. Natigilan lang ako nang humarang ang buhok ko sa mukha ko. Agad namang hinawi ni Xanthos ang buhok ko at inipit 'yon sa likod ng tainga ko.
"Do you want to eat to?" I asked and offered him my food.
"No, I'm good. Just eat," he said and stared at me.
I just smiled and continued eating. I didn't even realize that I was hungry earlier. This always happens when I'm stressed out. Palagi akong nalilipasan ng gutom. I'm weak when it comes to stress so I easily get depressed and disheartened. Mom knows it and she still lied to me like that and said something ridiculous. I'm so mad at her. How can she say that to her daughter.
I sighed and looked at Xanthos. He's still staring at me. I just cleared my throat and wiped the side of my lips. I hope I don't look like freakin' mess right now. He's staring at me intently, with emotions in his eyes that I couldn't read. I just smiled at him and scratched my nape.
"Is there something on my face?" I asked.
Xanthos nodded.
I gasped and touched my cheeks. "Ano'ng meron sa mukha ko?"
"Perfect eyebrows and eyelashes, beautiful eyes, pointed nose, and tempting lips," he said while staring at me.
Napasinghap na lang ako at napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya. Hindi ako prepared sa gano'ng atake n'ya. Bakit ba bigla na lang siyang nagpapakilig?
I just cleared my throat to look calm and unaffected even though my heart beats like crazy right now.
"T-Thank you. I know I'm beautiful," nauutal na sabi ko na lang.
Natawa si Xanthos saka hinawakan ang kamay ko at dinampian ng halik ang likod ng palad ko. Napangiti na lang ako at hinayaan siya.
Xanthos really gives comfort to my heart in a way that no one can do.
PAGKATAPOS KONG kumain, tumambay ulit kami sa labas ni Xanthos. Nakahiga kaming pareho sa beach chair. Nakayakap siya sa 'kin habang nakaunan naman ako sa braso n'ya.
Napabuntonghininga ako habang nakatitig sa langit. Napapapikit na lang ako sa tuwing nararamdaman ko na hinahaplos ni Xanthos ang buhok ko.
"Xanthos, why are you so perfect? It feels like you're way out of my league." I looked at him.
Xanthos let out a sexy laugh. "What are you talking about? I still don't deserve you. I have to work harder to prove my love for you... that's what courtship means, right? I want to be worthy of your love," he muttered and inhaled the scent of my hair.
I just closed my eyes and hugged him tighter. His embrace is the warmest place. The comfort it gives is enough to make me feel better. Being with him like this makes me forget all the things that caused me pain.
"Kiara, you make me forget all the grudge and wrath I feel inside. I told you before that your presence feels home... and it's true. I really love your warmth and the feelings you make me feel," he mumbled and kissed my temple.
I bit my lower lip while letting his words processed in my mind. I almost felt the chills within me as he said those words. I never heard something that sincere before. It makes my heart jump out of happiness.
"Xanthos, I love you... and I also love the feelings you make me feel," I muttered and gave him a soft kiss on his cheek.
He smiled. "I love you more, Kiara."
I just buried my face on his neck and tried to stop myself from crying. This moment warms my heart. I really want this moment and feelings to last forever.
XANTHOS REALLY helped me to unwind. Dalawang araw na kami sa yate na 'to at halos makalimutan ko ang lahat sa mga nagdaang araw. Nakikita ko minsan ang kapatid n'ya na si Xceron, pero tila wala naman itong pakialam sa presensya ko na mas ayos sa akin. Hindi ko rin naman siya madalas na makita.
"Wow, ngayon lang nagparamdam ang bruha."
I just chuckled when I heard Abi's voice on the other line. Nawala na sa isip ko ang tawagan siya simula ng umalis ako sa party ni Mom kaya malamang nag-alala talaga siya.
"I'm sorry, it's just a lot of things happened. Ngayon ko lang din na-charge 'tong phone ko," sabi ko na lang saka kumagat sa apple na kinakain ko.
"Why? What happened? Are you alright?"
Napangiti na lang ako sa sunod-sunod na tanong ni Abi sa kabilang linya. Naging seryoso rin ang boses n'ya. Alam n'ya rin kasi kung paano ako ma-stress.
"I'm fine, don't worry." I smiled even though she can't see me right now.
"Are you sure?" paninigurado pa n'ya.
"Yes, I'm doing good right now."
Matagal pa kaming nagkwentuhan ni Abi. Hindi ko na kinwento sa kanya ang tungkol sa 'min ni Mom dahil ayokong mag-alala pa siya lalo. Baka pati si Mom sugurin n'ya. Alam ko kung paano mainis si Abi dahil siya na talaga ang tagapagtanggol ko noon pa. She's the only female friend that I love and trust. She's like a sister to me.
Napatingin na lang ulit ako sa dagat matapos kong makipag-usap kay Abi. Nasa loob kasi si Xanthos at may inaasikaso. Naiintindihan ko naman dahil iniwan n'ya ang trabaho n'ya para lang mapagaan ang loob ko.
Natigilan ako nang tumunog ang phone ko. Agad kong sinagot ang tawag nang makita ko ang pangalan ni Manang Lanie sa caller ID.
"Hello po, bakit po kayo napatawag? Kumusta na po si Dad?" agad na tanong ko.
"Nako, Kiara. Bakit ngayon ka lang sumagot sa tawag? Alam mo bang nasa ospital ngayon ang Dad mo?"
Agad akong napatayo mula sa kinauupuan ko dahil sa sinabi ni manang. Agad na umakyat ang kaba sa dibdib ko.
"P-Po? Bakit po? Ano po ang nangyari?" kinakabahang tanong ko.
"Hindi ko masyadong naintindihan ang nangyari pero sa pagkakaalam ko, nanakaw ang pera n'yo sa bangko. Nabalitaan din namin na nasunog ang mga gusaling pag-aari n'yo kasama ang mga importanteng papeles. Hinimatay kahapon si Sir at nasa ospital siya ngayon."
I closed my eyes tightly and tried to calm myself. What the hell am I doing? Dad needs me right now. Kailangan ko na siyang puntahan kaagad.
Dali dali akong nagtungo sa kwarto kung nasaan si Xanthos. Naabutan ko siya na may kausap sa phone. Agad naman siyang natigilan nang makita ako.
"I'll talk to you later," Xanthos said and ended the call. "Why Kiara? Is there a problem?"
"X-Xanthos, we need to go back. Dad is at the hospital right now. Nanakawan siya at nasunog ang mga properties na pag-aari n'ya. H-He's suffering, he needs me right now so we need to go back," I said with shaking voice.
Nanlalabo na rin ang mga mata ko dahil sa mga luha.
Lumapit sa 'kin si Xanthos at marahang pinahid ang mga luha ko.
"Stop crying..." he mumbled. "That motherfucker deserves it anyway."
Pakiramdam ko binuhusan ako ng malamig na tubig dahil sa sinabi n'ya. Tama ba ako ng narinig?
"W-What are you saying all of a sudden, Xanthos?" I asked and held his hand.
"It's not enough, Kiara. Your father needs to suffer more. He deserves the worst pain possible and I'll give it to him. This is not enough. You see, I'm still being kind to him. He should be thankful. He doesn't even deserve to die early. He should live longer and suffer at the palm of my hands," Xanthos murmured while caressing my cheek.
"X-Xanthos, I don't understand you at all." My tears are now unstoppable. My whole body is trembling with unknown emotion. I don't know what to feel right now. I'm so confused.
"Thank you for letting me use you." Xanthos smirked. "Don't worry, I'll make sure the love you gave me will be worth it... I'll make good use of it, Kiara North."