I entered my room, fighting the urge to slam the door hard behind me. I have the urge to carry the heavy coffee table in the center of the room, and hurl it against the flat-screen TV mounted on the wall but I hold myself tight and fight against it. One of my eyes just returned to normal. I can't let myself lose control again!
I start pacing around the room to work off the rage I feel building in me then. I sniffed the air around me, hoping to get a whiff of my mate's essence so it would help calm me down faster, but nothing.
How could that be!? We spent the night together in the same room, her essence should linger around even if she's no longer in the room with me. I perceived Ella's essence probably because she cleaned the room after I left. I also got Eric's but nothing of my mate's.
It's strange. Being my mate, her essence was supposed to overpower all but she left no trace as if she was never in my room. As if she was never in my life even.
"Useless!... Useless piece of trash!" I don't know when those degrading words left my mouth in anger.
I'm supposed to feel bad for being verbally abusive to my mate, even if it was behind her back but no. I don't feel any guilt whatsoever. Maybe because she's indeed useless to me.
But whatever. I am determined to stay calm and get better with or without her useless essence. I won't allow the feral wildness to take over me this time. Not when I'd just called for the pack's executive's meeting. No, never!
The words Eric said to me came to mind then and I started repeating them to myself...
'I'm moving forward...
I'm forging ahead...
No more two steps forward and one step back...
I'm going to get better and not worse.'
Soon, my thoughts drifts to something less important and I feel myself calming down without realizing it. I look around my room and I wonder who owned it before it was given to me. Even though I couldn't smell the previous occupant's essence, I hate to think something that previously belonged to Justin was given to me for my use. The mansion is huge and has so many rooms. Since this is the main wing, what's the odd that this place didn't belong to Justin before it was passed to me?
A knock sounded on the door then and I called for the person to come inside. It's Eric. Instead of the clown coming inside after I asked him to, he slightly opens the door and peeks in through the small space.
"Are you calm? Am I safe?" He asked
"Are you safe from what? Get in here and quit trying so hard to be funny." I replied
He grins so widely that I wonder how his face doesn't hurt from always smiling so broadly.
"Eric, do you think this room belonged to Justin before it was given to me?" I immediately ask as he sits down. He doesn't hesitate before he replies to me
"No, it doesn't. The room has always been yours. Uncle Knox consulted with me before he had it furnished to your taste."
Eric's reply surprised me. I wonder how come I have a bedroom in a place where I was never allowed to spend even a night.
"My room? The room has always been mine?" I ask in wonder and he nods
"Yes. It doesn't look like it but this place actually has three wings instead of the two that most people thought. The front wing that they thought was the main wing actually has two wings in it"
"Oh..."
"Yeah... Two staircases lead upstairs from the living area. The one on the right leads to the first wing which is meant for the Alpha and his family. The left staircase which leads to the second wing was meant for the Alpha's Beta and his family.
Uncle Knox, Evelyn, and Justin stayed in the first wing. And as you know that my parents had their own house because my mom refused to live here with Evelyn as her next-door neighbor. Anyways, when everything went south between Uncle Knox and Evelyn, he moved out of the right wing to the left.
Two months ago he called me and asked how you would like your room to be decorated. I told him black with some touches of white."
He looks around as he talks like he's seeing the room for the first time.
"I actually like it. He did a great job. We couldn't have done better ourselves, or don't you like it?"
"I like it. I thought it belonged to Justin before. The thought of having anything handed down from him to me drives me up the wall."
"I also wouldn't let Justin's second-hand things be prepared for your use. It would drive me crazy too." He says and I nod
"Yeah, so are you going to hand that over, or do you still want to hang on to it a little bit longer?" I say, pointing to the phone he's holding.
"Oh, yeah!" He says and tosses it to me.
I caught it in midair.
"You're letting me have my old phone back so soon," I ask in excitement. "Didn't you say you bought a new one already?"
He laughs
"Dude, don't get too excited. That's the new phone you're holding in your hand not your old phone."
"Ohhh..." I say with disappointment and properly check the phone I have in my hand. It's the same thing with my old phone but it's indeed new
"I sent Timothy to get you a new one and he bought exactly the same as the previous one. I guess he didn't want you to miss the old one too much. Don't worry, you'll get it back soon."
"Yeah. In a month and not more." I replied. The new phone has truly been set up and ready to use. All my applications have already been updated except for Google Photo which I'm sure was deliberately uninstalled from the phone because it automatically backs up old pictures.
'This doesn't make sense. I already know what my mate looks like so why uninstalled Google photo application? What's there to hide?'
I am tempted to reinstall the app of course but I restrain myself. Apart from the fact that I don't want to break Eric's trust in me again, I also don't think it's wise to view something that would end up worsening my situation. Not right now anyway.
In the meantime, I chose to focus on the moment and call my dad but not before noting down my fourth piece of the jigsaw puzzle...
Puzzle piece number 5. The fastest way to unravel the mystery of my life, install Google Photos back into my phone (Disadvantages of this? I might go crazy in the long run)
"Thor!.. About time you call." My dad says. I can hear how happy he is from his tone of voice. It's been just three days. I never knew I could miss my old man this much until his voice boomed out from the phone's speaker.
"Hey, Pops," I reply with a smile as I move to sit beside Eric on the couch.
"Alpha Thor..." He says again. His voice teasing me. I can't help but laugh out loud myself
"I hope you're not gonna start calling me that. It sounded freakish coming from you.
"Like it sounded freakish when you addressed me as such, hmm... Anyway don't get your knickers in a twist, I'm not about to start calling you that. Just tell me, how are you? How are you holding up?"
"I'm great, Pops. Everything is great. How are you?"
"I'm great too, don't worry about me. The healer you got me is doing a great job."
"That's good to hear."
"Yeah, Eric told me all that has happened in the past few days. I'm glad you're holding up fine despite all..."
"Yeah, me too Dad..."
"Eric was supposed to call me, where's he anyway?"
"He's right here with me"
"Hey, Uncle Knox."
Eric and I replied at the same time.
"Hey, son. Good that both of you are together right now. So I spoke with Nate concerning what we discussed...