Viviane
He always talked to me about girls, but I never saw him with any. He always sought the company of men at the parties we went to together. He disappeared out of nowhere, without really telling me who. There were so many signs and I preferred to be blind to the real JP.
" Let's get out of here and talk somewhere else, " João Pedro said. I believe he was afraid of my reaction. " I'll be right back, wait for me here, okay? "He asked Jack, before we left, to which he only replied with a nod in an affirmative movement.
When we arrived at a cafeteria inside the clinic we were in, we were silent. I believe he didn't even know where to start talking and I just wasn't in a psychological condition after so many revelations in a single morning.
" I don't think I need to reveal my life then, do I?”
" I just can't understand why you hid it from me all this time…”
" I tried to talk to you a few times, but something always came up that got in my way and I lost courage.”
João Pedro wouldn't look me in the eye and had his head down. The waitress arrived and so we ordered coffee.
" I guess it doesn't matter anymore. While I'm sad that you never confided in me about this matter, I want you to know that it wouldn't change anything between us.”
" It wouldn't change our relationship, but you would try to convince me to assume my sexuality, if not for other people, at least for my family. And I don't want that. Not for now. I don't have your courage and determination. I don't want to be considered "different".”
" This is nonsense and you are smart enough to know it!”
" See what I just said?”
" I'm very sorry that you think that way.”
How could a person as smart as João submit himself to living a life of lies and subterfuge out of fear of what other people would say? It seems that the two brothers were more alike than I realized.
I would face everyone for João Felipe if he had the same courage as me to tell the world that we were together. I wouldn't care one bit what everyone would say.
" Please forgive me. I don't want our friendship to be shaken by this. I love you, Vivi. You are my little sister.”
He took my hand and I noticed that his eyes were teary. It hadn't been the best time to make such a discovery. But anyway, there was no point in being upset with JP for keeping something so private a secret when I was keeping my own.
" I will not say that I have nothing to forgive, because I do, sir. But I know that there are things that are so intimate and private that it's not easy for us to open up to another person, no matter how much we feel for them. And you'll understand this better when I tell you something I've been keeping hidden from you.”
João Pedro made a surprised face and was about to question me when I interrupted him. This was not the right time to expose my situation.
" First of all, now that I've discovered your big secret by myself, explain to me what you and Jack are doing here?”
" Long story!”
"I guessed," I said, managing to smile a little. " But we have time, don't we? After all, we're both skipping college.”
João Pedro then told me that he already had experiences with other boys since his early teens, but that he also dated girls. Until I met Jack a few months ago and fell in love. Jack was married at the time but separated the day they met at a nightclub. The two started their relationship, but Jack's ex-wife found out that she was pregnant and they ended up moving back in together, for the sake of the child.
However, during the separation, Marina had been with someone else, and she was not sure who the child was. That didn't stop Jack from coming home, giving her all the support she needed during the pregnancy. They were friends, above all, according to João Pedro.
Now the child was born and today they came for a paternity test.
" Wow, a complex story indeed.”
We stared at each other, and I took her hand across the table. I understood that he needed my support now because João Pedro and Jack had decided that if the child was Jack's, they would no longer be together.
" I don't even know what to say to you, but regardless of right or wrong, what matters most is that it's the best for everyone. Better than a father at home, he is a present and happy father. May you make your child happy. And that doesn't depend on him living with his mother, but on wanting to be a good father.”
João Felipe
Since Viviane had stormed out of our apartment a few days ago, I hadn't been able to talk to her anymore, even though I sent a few messages, I hadn't received any response from her.
I decided then that I wasn't going to run after her. I didn't even know what had caused such confusion, because if the friend was in trouble, then that shouldn't affect our relationship.
When she was calmer and came to me to talk civilly and coherently, then I would be waiting for her.
I continued with my intense work routine. I had already managed to catch up on everything that was overdue and had organized the opening of our branch in New York for a month from now at most.
I would like to have everything sorted out with Vivi by then so that I can propose that she go with me. But he had already understood that this would not be possible right away, due to his faculty. However, she would finish the course at the end of the year and it was August.
Everything was planned in my head and all that was left was to talk to Vivi. I'm sure she would agree to go with me to the US. There we could have more freedom to live our relationship and when my parents came to visit me, as they used to, I could stay at the hotel, since they never spent more than a week in New York.
Everything was well designed in my head, until a message arrived from Vivi, asking if we could meet at lunchtime, and indicating the location of a cafeteria on the campus of the university where I studied.
I ended up accepting it without further questioning, after all, I would like to talk to her and given the unanswered messages I had been getting in recent days, I thought it best to accept what she was offering me at that moment.
Arriving at the indicated snack bar, ten minutes before the time she had arranged, I found her already sitting in a very private place, in a corner.
" Hey.”