Chapter 59
***Larissa***
Presently
I peeked out the window in my bedroom as the cool breeze tickled my face. I walked to the balcony of the room and stared at the beauty of the night. The night was still young yet I battled with insomnia. And it was all because of him. Ever since he had been sending me letters, I had been losing sleep. It wasn't so big of a thing because I was a doctor, and doctors offer up sleep to work, but now, even the little time I had to rest, I couldn't sleep.
Logan.
Ever since I sent him my letter, I didn't receive any more from him. It felt good, in a way. Only for a month. I thought he'd finally given up although a part of me knew he wouldn't call it quits because it was about his dead father.
But did he think I was dense? Did he think sending me apologies via letters was going to appease me and make me want to help him? Maybe it would've worked six years ago but not now. I wasn't that larissa anymore. He irked me.
I glared at the letter in my hands, the one he had sent to me today. He had made it straightforward and brief. He had told me that this was going to be his last letter. He needed my help and he was politely asking me. But if I wanted it the hard way, then I'd get it the hard way.
At the conclusion of the letter he had written, “I bet you'd love it when I show up with a few of the pack members at the place you love the most. The hospital. Not only will you be at risk but the life of your beloved patients also. I lose my dad and you lose everything. It's just my dad, what else do I have to lose?”
My hands trembled as his words sank in my mind. The last word, “what else have I got to lose” is rhetorical. I weighed the odds, I had more to lose than he. He could lose just his father and still be Alpha. They’d still adore him and I would forever be detested by the pack.
And myself, I could lose my patients and maybe my life since my wolf side was suppressed and I had no superhuman strength in me. Then people might think I'm incompetent. Not only will I lose all I had toiled to build, my children were at risk also.
No! I won't let that happen. I won't.
I groaned lightly and rumpled the letter with all of my might. He was threatening me because I wouldn't help him? I let out a bitter laugh. The fuck did he do when I was maltreated? Nothing. He broke me even more. Now that he needed my help, and I wouldn't give it, I was the bad guy. He was just like his parents; users. Well then we could call it fairs. I would never help logan. Never.
A light touch on my shoulder caused a scream to escape from my lips. I whirled around to find Jack staring at me with curious yet bewildered eyes.
“Are you well?” He asked, “When I awoke you weren't at my side of the bed.”
“Good gracious jack! You spooked the living daylights out of me.” I sighed and tried to calm my racing heart as it thumped faster and louder in my chest.
Why did I think it was logan? He didn't even know my house. Maybe I was just so caught up in all of this, or was I scared of him?
Jack’s eyes watched my reaction and lowered to my hands. I was still clutching the letter which was now a ball of paper.
“Is everything okay?” Jack asked again, “You've been off lately and distracted too. You didn't even hear me walk in.”
I laughed nervously.
“I'm fine and everything is alright.”
“A great doctor, but a bad liar,” He pointed out.
I shrugged my shoulders, “everything is alright honey, I'm just so stressed, you know I still keep thinking if I'm really the best at this thing. Sometimes I get scared that I might not be as good as they think I am.”
Jack laughed heartily and pulled me in for a warm embrace. He placed a light kiss on my head.
“You see, my dearest. You're confident in everything but yourself. That's your only problem. You believe in me and everything else, but not me.”
I sighed.
He cupped my face in his hands. “Larissa, you're good at what you do. Anyone who loves their job, anyone who is dedicated at what they do, can handle anything. That's what keeps you going, my surgeon.” He planted a kiss on my nose, “You’re the best doctor, your patients love you dearly. I mean, if you weren't as good as you think you are, why are people from all over the world coming to the hospital to get treated?
You're a big deal darling. You earned yourself a respectable name, you earned the hospital a title. If you weren't so good then how did you do it? Tell me your secret.”
I chuckled and hugged him, “Thanks for believing in me.”
“Anytime, now come on in, you have a long day’s work tomorrow. Come and get that beauty sleep,” He whispered.
I smiled and walked into the room with him. He closed the glass door that led to the balcony and I contemplated on what to do with the letter. I had to get rid of it. I couldn't let Jack see what was inside. I would have a long explanation to do.
“Was your worry caused by the stuff in your hand? It seemed to have triggered the fear,” Jack said.
“What thing?” I laughed nervously and averted my eyes from his and stretched out the ball of paper, “you mean this?”
He just watched me.
“Larissa you don't seem well. Lately you zone out on me, a lot. We could be talking and suddenly you're elsewhere. Can I see? If anything is bothering you, you should at least be able to share it with me.”
I smiled apologetically and went to the bin to shred the letter into tiny bits, “It's nothing. I'm sorry it's just the stress. And this letter, it was given to me by a colleague” I lied.
“I see,” Jack said in a way I knew he didn't believe.
I smiled and went on, “He was asking me out on a date. You know, he's been hitting on me. But anyway, I don't care about that. I love my man, my children and my job.”
Jack smiled, I leaned into him and placed a kiss on his lips, “Let's go to bed now, I feel sleepy.”
As I went to bed with Jack, multiple thoughts crossed my mind. What did Logan have up his sleeves? Has he already become that sketchy? I knew he was a man to never relent or sit back and watch things not go his way. He’d do anything to get what he wanted but I wouldn't let that happen. I wouldn't let him have his way. Again.