Pinauna na ako ni Jahann na maligo habang inaayos nito ang tutulugan ko. Dalawan naman ang kwartosa bahay ni Jahann kaya ako ang gagamit ng guest room niya habang sa kwarto niya siya matutulog.
Napakamot ako ng ulo matapos kong isuot ang mga damit na ibinigay ni Jahann. I don’t have spare underwear with me so I just wear his shorts and shirt. Wala akong panloob pero makapal naman ang damit ni Jahann kaya hindi naman naaaninag ang katawan ko.
Ibinalot ko na lang ng tuwalya ang buhok ko bago lumabas ng banyo. Kipkip ko ang mga damit ko dahil lalabahan ko iyon ngayon para magamit ko kinabukasan. I went to his laundry area and washed my clothes. Hinayaan ko na muna iyon doon at bumalik sa loob ng guest room.
Naabutan ko si Jahann na naroon at may hawak na mug.
“Hot chocolate?” I asked him, smiling. He never failed to do that. Lagi niya akong dinadalahan lalo kapag malamig ang panahon.
He nodded and smiled at me. “Are you sure you’re okay here? You can sleep in my room and--”
“Jahann…” I stopped him and smiled. “I’m fine here. Besides, you said you’re going to work on something, diba? Kung doon ako, baka magulo kita.” Lumapit ako sa kanya at inabot ang hawak niya, naupo na rin ako sa kama at tumingin sa kanya.
“Hindi mo naman ako naiistorbo,” sagot niya sa akin bago umupo sa tabi ko. “I called them at home, Nikolai is already sleeping,” ani Jahann sa akin. Tumango naman ako ng marahan. Well, Nikolai is like that. Kahit hindi niya ako kasama, nakakatulog siya kaya naman hindi siya mahirap bantayan.
Inabot ko ang kamay ni Jahann at pinisil iyon. Napapansin ko naman na simula nang bumalik si Jahann at naging malapit ang loob nito kay Nikolai, lagi niya na itong iniintindi. Kaya naman alam ko na magiging mabuting ama talaga ito sa bata.
“Hmm?” he asked before looking at me.
Umiling naman ako sa kanya. “Aren’t you going to take a bath?” I asked him instead. Inangat ko ang kamay ko at hinawakan ang pisngi niya at marahan iyong hinaplos. Ngumiti ako sa kanya.
Hinawakan niya naman ang kamay ko at hinalikan ito.
Huminga siya ng malalim bago tumango at tumayo na. Yumuko lang siya sa akin at hinalikan ako sa noo. “Call me if you need anything, okay?” he said before kissing my head again.
“I will…” I softly said.
Lumabas naman na ito at isinarado ang pinto. Huminga na lang ako ng malalim para pakalmahin na rin ang sarili.
I know the tension is building up between us. Nangyari na iyon sa amin noon at wala naman ako sa posisyon para magpanggap na inosente tungkol sa bagay na iyon.
For Pete’s sake, may anak na nga kami, eh.
Umiling na lang akong muli para maalis ang nasa isip ko. Tumayo na lang ako at nilibot ang guest room na iyon. May mga cabinet doon na tanging mga bedsheets at pillowcases ang laman. Wala namang nakatirang iba roon kaya walang ibang gamit ang nasa kwarto na iyon maliban sa mga general na mga gamit na dapat ay nasa loob ng isang kwarto.
Jahann mentioned he called home already and Nikolai is sleeping.
Napangiti ako ng maliit nang maisip ang sinabi ni Jahann sa akin. Sabi niya ay hindi niya balak na itira si Nikolai rito sa condo dahil mas gusto pa rin niya na sa isang bahay talaga lalaki ang anak ko…
Ang anak namin.
Ang daling isipin na magkakasama kaming tatlo at magiging masaya pero hindi ko pa rin maiwasan na hindi isipin ang tungkol sa sitwasyon namin.
Kung hindi kumplikado ang lahat, baka katulad nila Theon, matanggap din nila kami.
I went out after a while. Nakakain naman na kami ni Jahann kanina pero hindi ko maiwasan na hindi magutom na naman kaya lumabas na muna ako ulit ng kwarto.
I checked my laundry before I walked back to the kitchen. Hindi pa naman ito tuyo kaya hindi ko na muna kinuha.
I looked for something to eat. Good thing was Jahann had food inside his condo. Kumuha na lang ako ng noodles at sinimulang lutuin iyon. Kumuha na rin ako ng iba pang pwedeng lutuin para maaya ko si Jahann na kumain.
I was busy cooking when I heard someone clear his throat.
Napalingon ako at nakita ko si Jahann na naroon. Hawak pa nito ang tuwalya at pinupunasan ang buhok. Humakbang ito papalapit sa akin para silipin ang ginagawa ko.
“You’re hungry?” He asked. I nodded shyly.
“I’ll continue this, go take your seat,” masuyong sabi ni Jahann sa akin bago hinawakan ang bewang ko at iginiya ako papunta sa lamesa at pinaupo. Sinimangutan ko naman siya pero hindi na rin ako nagsalita.
Pinanuod ko na lang siya habang nagluluto siya.
“You’re good at cooking. Bakit ‘di ka pa mag-asawa?” pang-aasar ko sa kanya habang nakatingin ako sa likod niya. Hindi ko mapigilang mapangiti nang lingunin niya ako.
“We’ll get married soon, okay?” he said before turning off the stove. Kumuha na rin siya ng paglalagyan ng noodles bago dinala iyon sa lamesa.
“Thank you…” I smiled. “This is for us,” sabi ko sa kanya kaya naman hinila ko siya paupo para kumain din siya kasabay ko. He just chuckled and blew the soup and fed me.
Naubos din naming dalawa ang pagkain. Nagprisinta na ako na maghugas ng pinagkainan dahil si Jahann naman na ang nagluto. Hindi naman siya tumanggi pero hindi rin siya umalis sa kusina habang naghuhugas ako.
“Shit,” mabilis kong pinatay ang gripo nang mabasa ako ng tubig.
“Why?” agad naman siyang lumapit sa akin at tinignan ang nangyari. Hindi ko mapigilang matawa nang makita ko siya. “Wala, nabasa lang ako,” I told him before dismissing him.
Nang matapos ako ay bumalik na rin si Jahann sa kusina at may dalang towel at ibinigay sa akin.
“Naghugas ka lang, mukha kang naligo sa lababo,” komento nito bago lumapit at iniabot sa akin ang hawak. Nagpasalamat naman ako sa kanya bago pinunasan ang sarili.
Natigilan ako nang maramdaman ko ang tingin ni Jahann sa akin.
“W-why…?” I asked him. Napalingon ako sa damit ko, dahil puti iyon at nabasa, naaaninag ang katawan ko kaya naman agad kong tinakip ang tuwalya sa damit ko.
“I…” pinamulhan ako ng pisngi.
Jahann looked away but I saw his ears and they’re turning red. “I’ll get you a new one,” he said before walking out.
Napapikit naman ako ng mariin.
“What the fuck, Cherinna…” tumalikod na lang ako at patuloy na pinunasan ang damit na suot ko. I am hoping he’ll bring me a black one.
Hindi kaagad nakabalik si Jahann kaya naman ako na ang nagpunta sa kwarto niya para kunin ang damit at makapagpalit na.
“No, I have to talk to them about that first, Airi.”
Kumunot ang noo ko nang marinig ko na may kausap siya. Nakatalikod siya sa akin kaya hindi niya ako nakita na nasa loob na ng kwarto niya.
Kausap na naman pala niya si Airi.
“Yes, I’ll talk to her about it,” he chuckled a little. He turned around and saw me standing inside his room. He smiled at me. “Alright, bye,” sabi nito bago pinatay ang tawag at lumapit sa akin.
“Sorry, baby,” he said before giving me the shirt.
“Why did she call you?” I asked him. Kahit na gusto kong itago ang iritasyon sa boses ko ay hindi ko iyon magawa dahil bigla na lang akong nainis nang marinig kong kausap niya si Airi.
Ayokong mainis sa babae pero hindi ko mapigilang hindi magselos kay Airi.
“She just asked about something, Creep,” sagot naman ni Jahann sa akin. I frowned at him and rolled my eyes.
Jahann chuckled and held my waist. “You’re still jealous of her? Really?” he said. Hindi ko alam kung amused ba siya na nagseselos ako o ano. Hindi naman mabilis mawawala ang selos ng isang tao.
Hindi naman din ako nagseselos dahil wala akong tiwala kay Jahann.
Nagseselos ako dahil ayokong makahanap siya ng taong mas sa akin at iyon ang magustuhan niya.
“I love you, okay?” he said before he pecked on my lips. He moved closer to me and planted soft kisses on my lips and cheeks.
“Jahann, my shirt is wet. Mababasa ka,” ani ko sa kanya nang yakapin niya ako.
He just smiled at me and held the hem of my shirt.
I looked at him and he’s looking straight into my eyes. There’s something in his eyes that makes me feel nervous and excited.
“I love you… just you,” he whispered as he pulled my shirt up.
“Jahann…” I bit my lower lip and covered myself with my arms when he successfully removed my shirt. I looked at him and I could feel something pulsating inside me.
He lowered his head and kissed my neck. I could hear him moan while his lips were on my skin.
I breathed heavily. Sa bawat dampi ng labi ni Jahann sa balat ko ay tila nito mas pinapainit ang nararamdaman ko.
Nakabukas ang air con sa kwarto ni Jahann, malakas ang ulan sa labas kaya naman tiyak na malamig ang panahon ngunit tila napakainit ng pakiramdam ko ngayon.
His hand was on my waist, kneading it. I could feel the warmth of his palm and it’s making me want more.
He kisses and licks my neck. I voluntarily tilted my neck and gave him more access to that part of my body.
I bit my lip hard to suppress my moans.
Naramdaman ko ang isang kamay niya na tinatanggal ang mga kamay ko sa pagkakatakip sa dibdib ko. I looked at him and Jahann’s blushing as well.
Hindi madilim sa kwarto ni Jahann kaya naman kitang-kita ko ang eskpresyon ng mukha niya.
I bit my lip hard when he looked at my boobs. I was about to cover them again when he stopped my hands and he looked at me.
“Jahann…” pakiramdam ko ay pulang-pula na ang pisngi ko dahil naaapektuhan ako sa ginagawa niya at nahihiya ako sa kanya.
He smiled at me before he lowered his face and pecked on my lips. He hugged me tight and brought me to his bed.
I groaned when my back touched his bed.
Hindi naman ako tanga para hindi maisip kung ano ang sunod na mangyayari sa aming dalawa ni Jahann. Alam ko na dapat ay pinahihinto ko na siya pero para akong napipi dahil hindi ko masabi ang mga salitang iyon.
I watched him as he removed his shirt and joined me in bed. He’s on top of me and he’s nuzzling on my neck.
I breathed heavily as I wrapped my arms around his neck.
Damn, Cherinna.
“Hmm… Jahann…” I let out a soft moan. His soft lips were still on my neck. His hands were on my waist, kneading it gently.
“Baby…” he whispered before licking my neck to my jaw. He planted soft kisses on it before kissing my earlobe and licking it.
“Hmm…” I closed my eyes. I know this is wrong but this feels so right… every kiss he’s making makes me want him more.
I missed him…
And I really love him…
“Ahhh…” I arched my back when I felt his hand on my boob. He’s palming my nipple and I could feel it hardening against his touch.
Lahat yata ng hiya na nararamdaman ko kanina ay natabunan na ng init na nararamdaman ko ngayon.
I never let anyone touch me the way Jahann does. I don’t want anyone else to touch me like this…
I felt him smiling against my neck. I bit my lower lip and tried to move away from him.
“No…” he whispered as he kneaded my boob gently. I let out a soft moan again.
Shit…
I opened my eyes when I felt him move his head. My eyes widened when I saw him kissing the side of my boob.
“Jahann…”
He looked at me as he smiled a little. He moved his head and began licking the crown of my boob.
“Ahhh…” napahawak ako ng mahigpit sa bed sheet ng kama ni Jahann nang maramdaman ko ang mga labi niya sa dibdib ko. He was looking at me while licking my nipple.
I bit my lip and moved my hand and held his head. I caressed his hair while he’s licking my nipple, teasing it and gently tugging it.
“Jahann… ohhh…” I tried my best not to close my eyes but that’s close to impossible especially when his hand travelled south and touched my center.
“Shit…” I arched my body again when I felt his hand on my center. I was still wearing his shorts but I don’t have anything else under that.
Namumula pa rin ang mukha ni Jahann habang patuloy ito sa ginagawa nito. Nakatingin siya sa akin kaya naman itinakip ko ang kamay ko sa mga mata niya.
He chuckled while my nipple was still on his mouth. After a few minutes, he abandoned my nipple and moved to the other one.
“Jahann…” bumibigat ang paghinga ko sa bawat dampi ng labi niya sa balat ko.
When he finished sucking my nipples, he looked at me again and smiled a little. “I love you…”
Pinamulahan naman ako ng pisngi sa sinabi niya kaya naman iniyakap ko sa kanya ang mga braso at hinila siya para halikan sa mga labi.
He smiled against my lips and started kissing me back. He playfully thrust his tongue inside my mouth and teased my tongue.
“Hmm…” I moaned against his lips.
All my inhibitions earlier were now at the far back of my mind. I know this might add to the problems we have to solve but maybe we’ll just think about that tomorrow.
Hindi na ako nagprotesta nang hilahin pababa ni Jahann ang natitirang suot ko. Mabilis ko siyang hinila upang hindi na niya tignan ang parteng iyon ng katawan ko.
He chuckled and looked at me. “Why…?”
Umiling ako sa kanya at hinila siyang muli para halikan sa mga labi.
Hindi naman na siya muling nagtanong at ginantihan na ang mga halik ko sa kanya. He moved his hand and touched me, I moaned loudly when he teased and rubbed my bud while kissing my lips.
“Jahann…” I breathed his name.
I looked at him when moved away a little. Napalingon ako sa katawan namin nang may maramdaman ako sa mga hita ko.
“Jahannn…” I called him and he looked at me.
Huminga siya ng malalim habang nakatingin sa akin. “Just tell me… if you want me to stop…” he looked at my lips and back to my eyes again. “I will…”
I know how hard it is for him to say those words. It’ll feel like hell if we stop now. Para sa kanya at para sa akin.
I cupped his face and smiled a little. “Go on… make love to me…” I said.
Jahann looked at me, maybe he couldn't believe what I just said, but I mean it. I want him to make love to me.
I moved my body and kissed his lips again. I hugged him tight.
Hindi naman nagtagal ang pagkabigla ni Jahann dahil naramdaman ko ng muli ang pagtugon niya sa mga halik ko.
After a few minutes, I felt his thing on my legs. Mas nag-init ang pakiramdam ko dahil doon.
We’ve done this before, but it’s still the same. ‘Yung pakiramdam ko noon, ganoon pa rin.
I moved my legs and Jahann moaned.
“Baby…” he called me. I bit my lip. He moaned sexily. It’s turning me on, too.
I moved my leg again and rubbed it on his thing.
“Cherinna Alecksia…” he called my name, more like threatening me. I saw him tighten his jaw.
I looked at him as I bit my lip. “Hmm…?”
“You’re being a tease, baby,” he said before claiming my lips again. He cupped my boob while kissing my lips. My moans were trapped inside his mouth.
I opened my eyes when I felt him positioned himself. I looked at him. He smirked and slowly thrust himself inside me.
“Ahhh…” napahawak ako ng mariin sa braso ni Jahann nang gumalaw siya at mas idiin ang sarili sa akin.
I heard him cussed when he moved his body against mine,
“Jahann…” I bit my lower lip as he began moving his hips. I could feel him inside me. He’s thrusting in and out of me and all I could do is moan his name while holding his arms.
“Ahhh…” he was kissing my neck while moving his hips. The feeling was familiar to me, it was still the same.
It’s just, it’s better this time.
I hugged him tight and buried my nails on his back while he’s moving on top of me.
He’s groaning and moaning while he’s thrusting himself deeper inside me.
I gasped when he moved harder.
“Jahann…” bumaon ang kuko ko sa likod niya habang patuloy siya sa paggalaw sa ibabaw ko. All I could hear inside his room are our moans and our body when they’re making sounds.
“Shit…” I tried to move away when I felt something inside me. Pakiramdam ko ay may kung anong gustong lumabas mula sa katawan ko habang patuloy si Jahann sa paggalaw sa ibabaw ko.
“Jahann… I…” I bit my lip hard when he moved deeper inside me. “Ohhh…” hinawakan ko siya ng mahigpit. I close my eyes when I feel like I’m releasing whatever it is inside me.
“Release it, baby…” he moaned against my neck as he moved his hips.
I nodded a little and moved my hips a little. “Ahhh…”
“Fuck…” he held my waist and moved faster.
“Jahann… ahhh…” I hugged him tight as I released my juice while he’s still inside me. He hugged me tight as he continued to move on top of me.
“Baby…” he moaned, I felt something warm inside me.
I looked at him.
“Jahann…” I called him, he looked at me and smiled a little. He’s still trying to catch his breath.
Pinamulahan ako ng pisngi at niyakap siya ng mahigpit. I buried my face on his check.
He chuckled and hugged me tight. He kissed my head and switched our position. I was now on top of him and he’s still inside me.
“Jahann…” pinagmasdan ko siya at ngumiti naman siya sa akin.
“I love you, Creep…” he softly said while caressing my cheek.
“I love you, too…” I replied. I rested my head on his chest and hugged him tight.
I felt him kissing my head again.
I smiled a little.
“I’ll marry you, okay? I promise you that…” he said.
I nodded a little and closed my eyes.
I will fight for him… I will fight for us…
I hugged him tight.
“I love you,” I whispered before I fell asleep.
Jahann hugged me tight.